Controlling

Mornings are usually when I am at my horniest.  Science says there is a surge of testosterone in the morning.  While I am sure that's true, I also think sleeping in something in something that focuses on my submissive side helps.  So does having ideas running through your mind.  In the hour or so before I got out of bed at 6 this morning, I had tons of thoughts going through my head.  1st, I knew as soon as I got up I would be locking myself in chastity per Mistress's orders.  Then I would replay scenarios in my head.  The one that ruled my morning was different ways of removing control from a submissive.  As a "grown ass man" with free will and such, it's very powerful to take things away from me or to force coerce me to do things other men don't have to do.

Things I currently do.

• Shave my entire body, including my armpits.  The armpit is still a tough one for me especially in the summer.  That being said, I certainly feel owned and feminized by it.
• Wear nighties or other feminine attire every night.  I used to let this slide, but Mistress's threats of caging me have changed that.
• Chastity
• Painted toenails in the winter months.
• Cum Eating occasionally
• Orgasm Denial
• Make appointments for Mistress
• Cage Time
• Strapon
• Mistress knows my location at all times due to GPS tracking

Things I read about online that I am sure are powerful.

• Speech restrictions - sub not allowed to speak unless spoken to.  Sometimes enforced with a gag.  Sometimes used during arguments to establish full control.
• Eye contact restrictions.
• Clothing being chosen.  Having clothes picked out for me to wear (even my day to day male clothes) would definitely show control.  It's so basic to decide what to wear, having that taken away is a huge mind fuck.
• Forced nudity
• Having to ask permission to use bathroom, go anywhere, buy things, is very controlling.
• Having food chosen.  Going out to a restaurant and having my food and drink chosen for me.  Like Mistress ordering me a salad and water while she has a steak and wine.  A good power move.
• Having access to my bank accounts, email, computer etc.
• Being restrained during non-play times i.e shackled during the day.
• Having pictures and videos taken of me in compromising situations
• Scheduled chores
• Sleeping in bondage
• Scent training
• Corner time
• Writing lines

As I write some of those things, I cringe as I know it would suck.  However, at the same time I know it's a great way to establish control as well as test my ability to agree to anything (with consequences for failure to comply).

As I said above, that's how my morning started.  I am now locked in chastity and my mind is a fog on submissive thoughts.  I am a lucky slave.  

Shifting Dynamics

Before I get into the post for the day I want to describe something that Mistress did yesterday that was small, but powerful.  Mistress made a concerted effort to comment on me still wearing my pink boy shorts and camisole under my clothes.  She touched both items and asked me what they were.  I just stammered something about being naughty clothes.  I was mildly humiliated, but for some reason also greatly turned on.  I loved/hated that she brought it out into the open.  I loved that she pushed my buttons.  In fact this morning I am still wearing my items and I have to admit that I was so turned on this morning that I didn't put on any of my male clothes over my outfit until I had fed the dog and did the dishes.  It felt pretty naughty to be doing chores like that.  I imagine having to wear outfits like that without covering up.  I also fantasize of expanding my outfits like these

Things are starting to change.  After lots of discussion, I set up the cage yesterday in our basement. It's a collapsible dog kennel and I used zip ties on it to make sure it's inescapable.  It's big enough to move around in (if not restrained) but not big enough to ever get comfortable.  There is a large padlock on the door and an opening to pass items through without opening the cage.

While I am not looking forward to spending any more than 5 minutes in the cage, I have to admit I am turned on.  Not by being locked in the cage, but by the shift in Mistress's attitude.  She is already using it as a threat when there is something I do that she doesn't like.  She is using it to change my behavior, and I have to admit it's powerful.  My attitude changes quickly when it's brought up.  I haven't spent one minute in the cage and it's already working.

Not me, yet.

Mistress also expressed a changing attitude as far as starting to use me to get her sexual needs met without concerning herself with mine.  It's been quite a while since we have done that.  When I first met her and I was teaching her how male orgasm denial works, she got pretty good at using me for her pleasure and denying me.  Since then it really hasn't happened other than back in December and January when I was locked in chastity for 31 days.  There were at least a couple times where Mistress used me and had multiple orgasms while I went without.  I think she may feel some guilt about it, but there is no need.  I thrive on being treated that way.  In fact I am excited to be going back into chastity as soon as possible and being used to take care of Mistress's needs.

As a result of this changing power dynamic I woke up terribly horny.  While some men might shudder at the thought of losing control, I am excited about it.  That's not to say there won't be some fits and starts, but now we have the tools to handle them.  I am in heaven.

Finally, I may regret sharing these posts, but here are a couple cage ideas I read over the last month or so.  My horny mind is getting the better of me.

Cage story #1 https://dominajen.com/2016/01/13/birthday-figging/     
Cage story #2 http://wedlocked-femdom.com/2014/03/05/cage-time/
Cage story #3 http://wedlocked-femdom.com/2014/08/23/bondage-box/

Moving forward

Mistress responded positively to my last post.  We had sex that night and told me that she did indeed have lots of time to deal with me.  With changes at work she could certainly put me under her thumb as much as she needed/wanted to.  She told me I would be plugging myself for 2 hours on Friday.  Failure to do so would put me in the cage for a long time.  She also reminded me that I owe her some cage time.  She added that during cage time I will be dressed in humiliating ways to add to the effect.  I have the feeling that she will be breaking me of some of my issues.  I'm hoping my post gives her the confidence to embrace her dominant side and give her tools to handle me when I disobey.  I am determined to be an obedient submissive, I just need help at times when I have insecurities and feelings of guilt.  I assured her I would love it if she had more control.  Control over my computer, money, clothing, etc.   I woke up super horny this morning even though I just came a couple days ago.  I believe it's due to the prospect of where this can take us.

Last night Mistress allowed me to skip wearing a nighty but only if I would wear feminine boy shorts and a camisole.  I picked out a pair of pink women's boxer briefs and a pink spaghetti strap camisole.  Waking up in this outfit my cock was straining against the shorts.  I tossed and turned this morning thinking of getting some feminine sleep outfits.  I thought about Mistress putting perfume in my nighty drawer as an added mind fuck.  I also thought about having to sleep in various forms of bondage.  Cuffs, even if not attached to anything, straight jacket, etc.  That's when I came to the realization that if Mistress makes me wear feminine clothes to bed every night that I will spend one third of the rest of my life cross dressed.  The thought of it makes my head spin a bit.  I am so horny that I am still wearing my outfit under my house clothes.

I just wanted to write a quick post about how lucky I feel to have been able to define my issues and move forward with my total submission to my Mistress.

A couple days ago I found this.  Normally a list like this is something I can;t agree with 100% and I would edit something out.  In this case I feel every one of these things.

Understanding Disobedience

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Dreaming about Femme

I don't have dreams much, or I should say I don't remember the dreams I have for the most part.  Last night I had a few.  2 were more nightmare than a dream.  The good dream was of me and my Mistress in a house with several other people, maybe 4-6.  It was morning and I was waking up in my pink, cotton, tight nighty on a  sleeper sofa in the main living area.  Mistress was next to me in bed and I wanted to get up to go pee.  Some people were up, but it was very casual.  She told me that it was ok, I could go and no one would judge me.  She told me that we had been practicing for something like this.  The reason she had me dressed feminine at home all the time now was so that when I was in public I would forget about it.  I got out of the bed and got up.  No one batted an eye.  Playing it back in my mind I realize the other people were all women.  There was nothing more to the dream.  It was pretty simple, but it did make me wake up in such a horny/feminine mood.

While on the topic of the nighty, we recently went on a trip.  We have been on many trips, and I have brought a nighty on many of those.  This trip was different because I wore a nighty every night.  I didn't "forget" to wear one even once.  I attribute this to the training and consistency Mistress has been using as well as the fear of punishment.  All good things in my book.

I do love it when Mistress pushes my feminization buttons.    

Mainstream Pegging

Apparently pegging is more mainstream than I knew.  Of course in the D/s world it;s pretty common, but know it's being discussed in mainstream TV and magazines.

A show on Comedy Central has one episode that involves miscommunication and some pegging.

That show brought it out into the open in a humorous way.  

I was reading a blog yesterday and it mentioned the women's magazine Cosmopolitan had a few articles on it, and sure enough there were.  I did a search and there were 8 total of which 2016 had 6 articles.  The three best are here.

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a58023/what-women-love-most-about-pegging/

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a58329/pegging-guys-who-love-it/

http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/news/a33458/sex-talk-realness-what-women-think-about-pegging/

Buzzfeed had an article - https://www.buzzfeed.com/swoozyc/heres-everything-you-need-to-know-about-pegging

How to convince your boyfriend - http://elitedaily.com/dating/get-your-boyfriend-to-agree-to-pegging/1490797/

Another one - http://www.bustle.com/articles/135261-ive-tried-pegging-with-my-male-sex-partners-and-this-is-exactly-what-it-looked-and

The most interesting part is while these articles are not D/s, power exchange is the most talked about reason both men and women seem to like it.  

I have posted in the past about D/s becoming more mainstream, it's also exciting to see strap-on play become more accepted.  Sometimes I feel like I came into this world about 10-15 years too soon for my kinkiness.

Chastity and Periods

Mistress mentioned that she liked the idea of me being locked during her periods as a reminder of what she is going through.  I was looking for some relevant blogs.  This is the most relevant one I could find.

http://flr-reading.tumblr.com/post/144909606913/chastity-and-orgasm-control-the-28-day-cycle  

This woman has it down to a science.  She has his entire month of chastity and orgasms synced with her monthly cycle.  28 days perfectly choreographed.  She goes from giving him 4 days of orgasms (5 a day) to a dead stop (the day she starts her period) to maximize his compliance when she needs it the most.  When her period is over his libido is built back up.  In the premenstrual days he is at his most obedient.  He is only unlocked 4 days a month and whenever she desires sex for the other 24 days.  His peaks coincide with hers.  Kind of hot really.    

That means he is locked 313 days a year (shudder).

A couple articles referenced in the post are linked below.

http://www.dreamloverlabs.com/harnessego.php

https://ladylubyanka.wordpress.com/2008/04/16/prostate-milking/

Ramped up

I'm a little surprised how quickly 24+ hours in chastity has gotten me ramped back up.  Last night I had lots of dreams that I faintly remember as being sexy and with D/s elements, but I don't remember any of them.  I do know that I woke up a few times with my cock straining against my chastity device.  When I got ready for bed last night I stood in front of the mirror in my nighty and with my chastity device sticking out from underneath.  I felt so erotically humiliated.  This morning when I got up, and went to the bathroom I pulled up my nighty and sat down to pee with my pink chastity device squeezing my cock.  Again, so erotically humiliating.  To be a masculine guy at my age with such feminine and submissive tendencies just makes my head spin.  Just writing this makes my head spin.

I ran into a blog yesterday that I have been reading a bit http://wedlocked-femdom.com/    I haven't read much, but the few things I have read are her keeping her man in chastity pretty much 24/7, she frequently chains him to her bed, and he's forced to wear latex shorts as well as a latex maids dress http://wedlocked-femdom.com/2014/03/29/locked-in-a-pvc-maids-dress/

I don't know why the longer I go without cumming the more my brain fills with feminine thoughts.  I understand why I get more extreme fantasies, but the feminine part surprises me.  I would think the more cum I get stored up, the more I would have masculine thoughts.  Either way, my mind is a mess today.  A nice horny, desperate mess.  

In a mood...

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New Opportunities

We have had some recent changes in our world.  This means we will be spending much more time together and will have free time we didn't have before.  The other night Mistress said something to the effect of " since I have less control at work, I plan to take more control of you".  That is one of the hottest things I have ever heard.

My job has gotten to the point of where I work form home much more than I had.  This morning in my horny haziness of trying to wake up I had naughty thoughts of being put in unusual situations during the day.  I read lots of stories of Mistresses that make their slaves stay naked around the house.  Others make their slaves wear a suit while others keep their men in feminine wear or bondage all day.  Some torture their slaves during the day in intervals https://msscarletuk.wordpress.com/  I thought of having to wear clothes I see in ads in gay bondage websites or slutty outfits all day.

Mistress now has more time to watch or read naughty things.  She has the ability to be a task master and make me drop what I am doing to do whatever she wishes.  She can essentially have 24/7 control over me as her job won't interfere like it did before.  Mistress is very creative when she has the time and ability.  When we first met she had a voracious appetite for learning my proclivities and put me in some very unique situations.

I adore my Mistress and want her to be the happiest woman on the planet.  I am very excited to please her in any way I can.  

Chastity

I did some quick math and realized I have spent more time in chastity this year than the last 2 years combined.

2014 - 17 days
2015 - 21.5 days
YTD - 48 days

We still have 4+ months to go.  Eeek!

A Nice Edge

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New Outlook On Chastity

I started experimenting with chastity back in 1999 or 2000.  At the time I started with the CB-2000.

Not Me

This was such a new concept.  The thought of being under control by my then wife was so exciting.  The device was terribly uncomfortable, but I made due.  The biggest issue was that my wife never really got into the chastity thing.  I take that back.  She got into having me lock up and then forgetting about it.  I traveled quite a bit back then and to be on the road, locked up and having your keyholder ignore the situation was awful.  I am willing to trade some discomfort for the excitement, but the excitement wasn't there.  The device eventually broke while sleeping one night.  It was so painful that I still remember it.

I then upgraded to the CB-3000

The device was a mild upgrade, but still not worth the hassle without a keyholder that was not an active participant.  I became resentful.  Not at the concept of chastity, but at how it was implemented.  

Many years later the wife at the time started to get a little bit more into D/s and FLR.  We attended some events, visited a pro-domme a few times and that created an opportunity to try chastity again.  We decided to invest in a custom device.  I got a Price Alber piercing to prevent pulling out from the device.  We did lots of research and spent way too much money on a beautiful custom device.

This device was the best I have owned.  It was heavy but for the most part comfortable.  I still had the issue of my balls being pulled and after a week my scrotum would start to chaffe to to all the readjusting.  It's very secure, especially with the lock that goes through the piercing.  Within a year of getting this device my marriage had ended.  My new partner and now Mistress and keyholder took more interest in chastity, but the same issues came back.  I became resentful about chastity.  

In the last year I had a mindset change and decided that my being chaste was of showing I was invested in D/s.  The mindset helped quite a bit.  At the end of 2015 and into 2015 I went 4 weeks and 1 day in chastity.  It was the easiest chastity experience as Mistress was more involved than normal.  However the device was still more work than it was worth.

Over the last couple years I started seeing devices that didn't need to support itself off the testicles.  I was intrigued.  Men really seemed to like these devices and swore they were more comfortable.  I was skeptical as I have already invested a small fortune in devices.  I came across a plastic device that was 3-D printed.  

It's super lightweight.  In fact the lock on the device weighs as mush as the device itself.  If I use the plastic security tabs it;s only a couple ounces.  Since my sweet spot for an orgasm is right below the glans, I don't need a device that covers my entire cock.  Just the top third is enough to prevent me from trying to stimulate myself.  I can cheat and get an orgasm from a Hitachi, but you can do that with any device.  I really don't like Hitachi orgasms as much as friction based ones anyhow.  

So after 15 years of chastity resentment I have determined it was due to the discomfort of the device.  My current device is comfortable enough that I don't need the constant attention of my keyholder to override the discomfort of the device.  Obviously the more attention, the better, but the device itself creates no resentment for me.  I can ride my bike, run, lift weights, swim, etc and really not have to worry about the device all that much.  I can pee standing up for the most part but I still sit at home which most guys with piercings do anyhow.  I can wear whatever I want.  Feminine clothing is much more comfortable with this device vs other devices.  

All of that being said, I now find chastity enjoyable.  I recently went 2.5 weeks without being locked and kind of missed it.  I wasn't about to ask to be locked up, but was pleasantly surprised when I was told I would be.  All the fantasies I had for years are more believable now.  Having my cock locked and owned by my Mistress.  Giving up the right to touch my cock.  Giving up 100% control of my orgasms.  Being able to prove my fidelity (I'm not the cheating type, but a device certainly proves it).  All of the above with very little discomfort.  It's a match made in heaven for me.  So all of my years of complaining about chastity are over.               

Femme in Public

I've now been locked in chastity for 8 days other than a brief reprieve when I got my beating.  The chastity is now working its magic.  Even though life and work has been keeping any erotic thoughts out of my head, the constant feeling of chastity keeps pulling my thoughts in that direction.  I frequently find myself thinking about how I don't know what my cock feels like.  I am getting hornier and more desperate by the day.  As I have written over the years I dislike chastity, or I used to dislike it.  Now that I have a super comfortable device, I actually like it.  It's not perfect, but damn close.  I will soon write a post about how I view chastity now.

Today's post is based on a blog post I read a few weeks ago that I can't get out of my mind.  In the post, a Mistress takes her slave to get his/her makeup done professionally.  I frequently fantasize about being feminized in front of another woman, but the thought also scares the crap out of me.  Here are some of my thoughts.

• I think about something similar to this story, or 
• Me having to be feminine in front of a pro-domme
• Having boudoir photos taken of me as my alter ego Sophia
• Out in public dressed.  (Halloween, Gas Station, Drag Queen Events)

Here are some key phrases that stood out.

So we set an appointment for this past weekend.  And, as I’m sure you all know, I had lots and lots and lots of fun in the days and hours leading up to that appointment.  The poor sissy’s blood pressure was probably off the charts.  He was so nervous and flustered.  It was adorable.

More than the humiliation of having to endure it, more than being seen by more than one person that way, more than yet another piece of his masculinity being taken from him, that was what worried him the most.

“Do you want sweet?  Sultry?  Day?  Night?  Glamour?”  “Let’s go with sweet and innocent,” I told her, with a very not-sweet-and-innocent grin at Sounder.

Less than an hour later, she stepped back and asked Sounder what he thought.  He turned to me, and I couldn’t stop smiling.  He looked pretty.  Downright pretty.

Still, I couldn’t help but pull up his dress in the car and stroke him through his panties.  I drive an SUV, and he pulled his dress back down when we pulled up at a stop light next to another SUV.

Full story here - https://dominajen.com/2016/07/20/sissy-slut/

There is a 2nd part to the story that isn't my cup of tea, but I am sure Mistress will enjoy reading.  https://dominajen.com/2016/07/22/and-part-2/

Happily surprised and a little worried

Last night Mistress decided to tie me up and have some fun.  I found myself tied spreadeagled and blindfolded on the bed.  Immediately a couple swift smacks to the balls and then the Hitachi turned on under my balls.  I was in heaven.  Mistress undid each leg and slid 2 rubber bands designed for binders up each leg before tying me back down.  She then alternated between snapping the rubber bands and using a super skinny stick and a fat rubber stick on the inside of my thighs.  She has done this many times before, but this time was different.  I couldn't put my finger on it.  It hurt more than usual.  Frankly it sucked.  She would occasionally stroke my cock, but not with any real purpose so it didn't do much to alleviate the pain.  She said she was punishing me for recent transgressions.

It turns out there was a reason for the pain to be more than I was used to, more than just punishing me.  She had a plan.  After reading for the last 6 years that I felt she was too kind, and didn't push me to my limit, she was going to do just that.  She kept asking if I was enjoying it.  While I was enjoying the bondage and the cock stroking, the beating fucking sucked.  She kept asking me if I was ready to call red.  I really didn't want to.  I became annoyed and mad.  I was pissed off and irritated.  I didn't like it.  There was very little eroticism to the pain.  I kept begging her to stop without saying red.  I didn't realize it at the time, but now I see I was testing her to see if she would quit or pull back.  I'm happy to say she didn't.

After I called red, she released me.  I retreated a bit while I dealt with these new emotions.  To add insult to injury she told me to lock myself back up in chastity immediately.  Well played.

As I knew would happen, what I felt last night has gone away.  Writing about the above experience got me hard.  Not hard because I got a beating I didn't like, hard because I have a Mistress that is willing to push me as well as punish me.  Truly punish me.  That makes being in a D/s relationship much more real.  Last night I truly submitted.  I had no control other than "red".  This is what I have been asking for.

Moving forward, I love the idea of playing closer to my physical and mental limits.  There are some challenges however.  Last night I was in a fight or flight response.  Had I been untied I would have left the room or physically kept her from hitting me.  Since I was restrained I had to deal with it so I alternated between emotional fight and flight.  Dealing with me saying and acting like "i don't like this" will be a challenge for her.  Pushing through that attitude and making me deal with it will be hard, but also very rewarding.  I am excited at the prospect and a little scared.

I woke up in the middle of the night last night and replayed the scene in my head.  Knowing that Mistress is willing to go until I beg her to stop had my mind running with other scenarios that push limits.  Below are somethings that could really test my limit and make we want to say "red".  It's also hot to think that "red" might be ignored.  I now believe Mistress has it in her.

• Painful or uncomfortable bondage
• Electricity 
• Public Humiliation
• Breath Play
• Chastity
• Teasing and Denial
• Nipple Play
• Cum Eating
• Corner Time
• Time Out
• Cage
• Piss Play
• Strap on or fucking machine
• Cross dressing
• Public feminization
• Oral Sex
• Dildo sucking
• Ball busting
• Butt Plugs - extended wear
• Scent Play
• Edging

I know we can't always play to my limits.  It's her choice of when we do that.  I just want to end this by saying I am so happy she can be mean and sadistic if she wants.  I just hope it turns her on to be that way sometimes.

Too Nice?

Last night Mistress and I had quick but hot sex.  As soon as we started she started talking about some things she has planned on an upcoming trip.  Clear nail polish for both my finger and toe nails.  Panties almost every day.  Teasing and denial while I am locked in chastity.  Mistress fucking my ass with a dildo.  The sex was quick, but much needed.

Mistress is very kind to me and as a macho male I appreciate it, however my submissive side is looking back on last night thinking she was too nice.  First off, I came a bunch.  Half of me is thankful Mistress didn't make me eat any of it.  The other half is wishing Mistress at least smeared cum all over my face if not making me use my tongue to clean up.  The other nice thing Mistress did was not make me lock myself back up in chastity right away.  In fact, she went to work and told me to lock myself up after my bike ride this morning.  While physically I was happy to be unlocked for sleep and my ride, my submissive mind yearned for a meaner version of Mistress that locked me up the second I came.  The mind fuck of instant lock up is insane.   I guess what I am saying is that as a submissive male, meaner = nicer.

To punish or not?

I have waited a few days to write this post as I wasn't sure how to approach it.  A few nights ago Mistress and I had a stupid fight right before bed.  I was so mad and frustrated that I went to sleep in a spare bedroom and purposely chose not to wear a nighty like I have been ordered to every night for weeks.  That's one of the hard things about real life in a D/s relationship.  I was so bent out of shape about our argument that I couldn't imagine being told to do something. Had I been locked in chastity I would have left the device on.  It's easier to keep doing it if I already started vs going to put something on when I'm mad.

So this is where the tough part comes in.  We both agree the fight was stupid.  Do we keep our system in place or do we go with a one time waiver due to the circumstances?  At first, I was thinking a waiver is appropriate.  The last couple days I have changed my mind on that.  Here's why.  Let's say my punishment is to spend a night in the cage.  I could try and argue that we should waive it due to the fight being stupid.  Ultimately, she doesn't have to give me a reason for making me do whatever she wants.  In fact, she could say, "I will waive the punishment, but I want you to sleep in the cage because it pleases me."  There would be no argument for that.  I have already agreed to those terms.

Another plus to a punishment (whatever it may be) is I may think twice the next time something like this happens.  Maybe not.  Either way, the dynamic would continue.

One one hand I am not wanting a punishment because it will suck.  On the other hand, I want a punishment to enforce the rules.  How can rules be enforced without consequences?  I wrote this simply to let Mistress know what has been going through my mind since Monday night.

Mainstream D/s?

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Professional Domme

Mistress and I have talked about spending some time Professional Domme at some point in the future.  Discussions have ranged from just me going to us both going.  I imagine us going together and me being domme'd by both, as well as us both being domme'd by a Mistress.  I also imagine Mistress sending me to one with me not having a clue what was going to happen.

We're still very much in a cautious discussion phase.  I had mentioned to her that I read a blog where the husband and wife have done this.  I was going to include some passages that I found hot, but I find that I can't do it any justice.  So here are the relevant links to her page from oldest to newest.

Professional Attention - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2012/02/professional-attention.html


Visit with a Pro: part 1 - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2012/03/visit-with-pro-part-1.html
Visit with a Pro: part 2 - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2012/03/visit-with-pro-part-2.html
Visit with a Pro: part 3 - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2012/03/visit-with-pro-part-3.html


Personal Trainer: third time lucky - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2013/06/personal-trainer-third-time-lucky.html
Update on Trainer - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2013/12/update-on-trainer.html


Husband Punished by Wife in front of Escort - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2015/12/husband-punished-by-wife-in-front-of.html


Playtime! - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2016/03/playtime.html
Playtime Happened: My Spanking - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2016/03/playtime-happened-my-spanking.html
Playtime Happened: His Spanking - http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2016/03/playtime-happened-his-spanking.html

Orgasm and Chastity Update

Last night Mistress and I had a bit of sexy time.   I begged Mistress to not let me cum, but she told me if I didn't I would be sleeping in the cage. I didn't realize it had been so long, but I went 22 days without an orgasm.  Now the clock is back to zero :-(

Additionally I had been locked in chastity for over 7 days, and I must say, with my new device it was the easiest 7 days I have had in 16 years of experimenting with chastity.  Mistress let me stay unlocked overnight and had me lock back up this morning.  Finally a device I can wear indefinitely.

from Evotion Wearables

Is Harsh Possible?

Last month I read a blog post from one of my favorite bloggers http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/

Julie and her husband are into some pretty hard spanking scenarios.  In fact, she likes the term beating and I would agree that's what she does.  The post I am referencing is about some of her readers saying she was "overly sadistic".  Some readers seem to be horrified that she can be that mean and that her husband is somehow being abused.

To make sure that her husband was ok with things they had a discussion.  He assured her things were just perfect.  On his part, he likes to beg her to stop and to vocalize his discomfort, but recently held back because he felt her relent. To make sure they were on the same page they decided to test things out.  They went back to square one and started with a safeword again for a practice beating.  Julie starts beating her husband, and when he starts begging her to stop, she feels herself start to let up.  She remembers the agreement and she keeps going, harder now.  It turns out she can go much harder than she thought and that he is really ok with it.  He eventually uses his safeword, not because of the beating, but because she threatens to withhold his tongue from her pussy.  I wrote this purposely vague as I think she writes this scene much better than I can paraphrase, so here is the link to the post 

http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2016/06/sadistic-julie.html  (the comments are pretty hot too).

The reason this post has stuck in my head, is I too yearn for harsher treatment.  I think it's hard as the dominant one to hurt someone and not know if the hurt is good or bad.  My Mistress gets turned on when she hurts me, but I also think she holds back.  Now I'm not saying I can take super harsh treatment, but I do think it's worth exploring.  This harsh treatment doesn't have to just be spankings.  It can take other forms like caging, chastity, feminization, along with the dozens of other nasty things I blog about.  Any of them can be pushed to an extreme and become harsh, which gets me hard just thinking about it.

Hopefully this post isn't taken as a pushy bottom as much as a communication.

from http://couplespank.tumblr.com/

  

      

A different take on "ruined orgasms"

Here is the 2nd post I saw that intrigued the heck out of me.  The term "ruined orgasm" is always something I have taken to mean as less pleasurable.  I have posted in the past about how there is a good reason to use a ruined orgasms to keep the post orgasm let down to a minimum so that the male submissive is aroused sooner.  This woman takes the concept to the next level.  She uses ruined orgasms to immediately use her man.  Here is a good synopsis in her words.

Whereas a normal orgasm causes him to go limp and enter what doctors call the “refractory period” where he is no longer motivated to have sex, a ruined orgasm has the opposite effect – it causes him to stay hard, fully aroused, hyper-energized, and HIGHLY motivated to have sex.

But that’s not all.  It also relaxes the urgent release channels, in his brain, temporarily raising his tolerance for sexual pleasure and increasing his stamina.  Simply put… a man who’s been ruined once or twice (or more!) in a single night can fuck you harder and longer than you ever thought possible.  He can fuck (or get fucked) continuously, relentlessly, at full intensity until you’ve had as many orgasms as you want and you’re both thoroughly exhausted.  Go ahead, get sweaty!  Let him wreck you!  Flip him and ride him to your heart’s content!  He will stay rock-hard the entire time, and he won’t cum!  Or, if he does cum, it will only be after a long, intense lovemaking session, far beyond his normal, natural physical capacity.  It’s fucking AWESOME!  Some of the best sex you will ever have!

I have experienced this myself a few times.  It usually when I am inside Mistress and I leak a bit.  The need to cum is reduced and I can then go forever.  It feels good (not as good as a full orgasm) and when I do eventually go over the top it's stronger.  It's hard to stop at just the right time.  The other time I experience it is when I am edging.  Sometimes I stop and 30 seconds later cum oozes out. I lick up my own cum because I haven't had a full orgasm and the horniness is still there.  If I went over the edge, I can't imagine freely eating my own cum.  I then stop as I don't trust myself to be able to stop like that again.  There is a huge benefit being tied up as Mistress can more effectively stop than I can.  I would define this as a minimized orgasm in order to have a fuller orgasm.  It's the closest a guy can be to multi-orgasmic.

There is much, much more to her technique which can be read here   http://healthysexymarriage.tumblr.com/post/145637171302/the-ruined-orgasm

Breaking him erotically

I ran across a Tumblr blog that had a couple really good posts.  The first one is about a Mistress breaking her slave, but instead of doing it with pain, she did it with weeks of teasing and denial.  To quote her "A month and a half ago, my amazing, sexy husband agreed to three months of constant tease and denial, without release.  Since then, almost every night, 7 nights a week (and sometimes in the morning, too!), we work together to make me cum as much as I want, then I edge him intensely, over and over again, to my heart’s content."   

The thought of being mercilessly tied, teased and denied for days and weeks on end turns me on and it also scares me.  I can only imagine the things I would be willing to do just for the chance to cum.  The idea of giving Mistress dozens if not hundreds of orgasms while at the same time I would get none is something that excites me greatly. As much as it disappoints me, there is something very powerful when Mistress tells me "no" when I ask to cum.

The entire post can be seen here http://healthysexymarriage.tumblr.com/post/144465521427/break-him-carefully-halfway-there-a-month-and-a

After I wrote that, I found another couple doing it http://healthysexymarriage.tumblr.com/post/142086842407/saw-you-post-and-note-about-three-months-of