Cheater

Mistress and I recently went out of town.  I was unlocked on Saturday, April 6th so that I could shave my entire body and safely travel through the airport.  Mistress and I had sex on Sunday morning and I had my first orgasm in 76 days.  It was pretty awesome.

Sunday night I locked myself in chastity so that I wouldn't be tempted to cheat and masturbate.

Monday night, Mistress was in bed, so I snuck off and masturbated into the toilet.  Bad boy!

Tuesday morning I edged myself, a lot.  Tuesday night I behaved.

Wednesday morning I edged again, and again, and again.

Wednesday night Mistress had me fuck her and give her a nice squirty couple of orgasms and didn't allow me to cum.  I begged to be put into chastity and she said 'no'.  I was too horny to obey and snuck off to masturbate again.

Thursday night we were in a new city and a new hotel.  I behaved.

Friday night I behaved

Saturday night Mistress and I started to have sex, we miscommunicated and didn't end up having sex.  I snuck off again.

We have been home for the last 6 days and I haven't edged or masturbated.  Something about our routine that keeps me chaste.  Traveling and being in new places makes me very, very horny and I can't help myself.  I wish Mistress would keep me locked up while traveling.

This is NOT me

Dressing up, edging and ball busting.

Yesterday after my post, I decided to do a bit of self feminization.  I put on a pair of black panties, black bra, my silicone inserts, a dress and a pair of heels.

It had been some time since I had worn heels so they hurt fairly soon.  Apparently I need to keep my feet conditioned for heels.  I worked for a few hours and then went to shave.  Before shaving I wanted to see if I could edge myself with the Hitachi with such a small chastity device on.  I could.  

I took turns running the Hitachi on the chastity device and on the prostate stimulator in my ass.  I think I could have milked myself if I had time.

I got ready and met up with Mistress.  I snuck off my device when she wasn't looking.  She's got a lot going on and I didn't want to bring any of this to her without her asking for it.

Mistress is occupied today as well, so I decided to do a bit of self-bondage.  I put on my humbler device on the front.  I also tied up my ankles, below my knees and above my knees.  I promised I was going to hit my balls 100 times with the thick plastic paddle or the thick strap.  My stroke #20 on my balls I could feel an orgasm starting.  I had to stop.  Holy cow.  I am so horny I could come from a ball busting.

You can see a bit of cum that leaked out.  I hungrily licked it up.  I hit my balls another 10 times and the same thing happened with a bit more leakage.  I decided to stop before I went over the edge.  

As I write this I have the shocking dog collar on my balls.  I edge myself and then give my balls a quick shock.  I stop doing this as I can feel the pain is going to push me over the edge.  My goodness  I am so horny.

Gotta Run!

Drunk, Denied and Desperate

Yesterday was an interesting day.   I woke up super horny and put on a pair of panties.  I got some work done and edged myself a few times.  After that I had to go visit a client.  I put a cock ring on before I left the house.  When I got home I worked out and still wore the cock ring.  I took a shower and Mistress and I went to a movie and drinks later.  Wearing a cock ring all day got me very worked up.

When we got home we watched some TV and Mistress fell asleep on the couch.  I headed to bed and when I was brushing my teeth I got the idea to wear my perfume to bed.  That did it.  The scent over powered me and my horniness shot through the roof.  That scent makes me so desperate.

As soon as the scent hit my nostrils, I knew I had to edge myself a couple times.  I used the Hitachi and was edged in less than 10 seconds.  Since I was in the toy drawer I used a few toys on myself.  Clover nipple clamps, inflatable dildo gag, spider gag, and clothespins, all while edging myself.  That and the scent made my head spin.

I then decided to try on some feminine attire while continuing to edge.  For each outfit I edged 2 times and changed outfits.

A little bit of leakage

 

I ran a real risk of Mistress waking up and coming into the bedroom.  Part of me wanted to get caught and to have to deal with the consequences.  Another part of my wanted to fall asleep dressed and to get caught and humiliated.

I also covered my cock with 16 clothespins.  It hurt, but it got me very worked up.  The ones around the head were the worst.

Lastly, I edged myself, want to put a few drops into a pair of cum stained panties in the toy drawer.  Unfortunately a bit too much leaked out and it was enough for me to stop playing and to go back to bed.  I should have licked it up, but I left it to dry in the panties.  The good news is that I didn't leak too much to take the edge off however so today will be another extremely horny day.

A lot of sneaky edging

The last few days I have been edging quite a bit.  Mistress has been running errands and when she leaves I edge a few times.  Yesterday, before I could even get to an edge I was leaking.  I have never been a leaker.  I managed to lick up most of it, but apparently I didn't get it all.

I was edging to poor guys getting ruined orgasm after ruined orgasm when they are tied up and not able to move a muscle. 

The woman in the video below has a very good torturous technique.  It's so firm yet so slow.  When she ruins his orgasm at the end, I know his exact response as I have felt that same way.  The swear words can't come out enough.



  

Another Edging Morning

Mistress and I have been extremely busy and Mistress has been sick for over 3 weeks now.  We haven't been able to be intimate and I haven't been able to keep my body shaved like I normally do.  Yesterday I shaved everything (eyebrows are the only hair on my body).  I instantly felt submissive and feminine.  I added my feminine deodorant and small spray of perfume.  I almost wore panties but decided against it.  

This morning Mistress was out of bed before me.  I edged myself 40-50 times.  The first edge I wasn't even hard and I leaked a bit.  Mistress walked in 90 seconds after I was done edging, I almost got caught.  I'm curious how that would have gone.  While I edged I imagined being tied down to where I couldn't move a muscle.  Mistress would then tease and keep me on the edge until I was literally in tears, begging to do anything to get the chance to either cum or to release me.  To be driven crazy with pleasure, but not enough pleasure is such a turn on.

Today I also logged my last orgasm which was 3.5 weeks ago.  I have only cum 5 times all year.  Last year at this time I have already cum 15 times.  Since Mistress and I haven't been intimate, I have told myself I would cheat and give myself a full orgasm, especially since my last one was mostly ruined.  I haven't done it.  I have been very chaste.

So a few more edges before Mistress gets home and some images of the way I imagine being restrained and tease tortured.

  

And another edging morning

Mistress stepped out this morning for a meeting.  I was able to edge a good 20 times with just a little git of leakage (that I licked up).  Today's edging motivation was predicament bondage.

Confession

It's been nearly 3 months since I posted.  Life has been very busy, but its also been very good.  I'm too busy to be posting regularly, but had to do a quick post.

The last couple of days my mind has been going back to my submissive place.  I've been fantasizing about chastity, collars, feminization, painted toe nails, panties, teasing & denial and forced cum eating from Mistress' pussy.

This morning I couldn't help myself and edged quite a bit.  I edged to some trailers from www.divinebitches.com  The hottest ones were the ones with the guys locked in chastity while being tortured.  Their cocks being totally ignored.

My edges got a bit too close a couple of times and I had tiny drops of cum that I licked up.  I felt so dirty.  I was tempted with sneaking a full orgasm, but thought better of it.  Since I am still nice and horny, I am desperate enough to confess my sins.  Had I allowed myself an orgasm, I wouldn't have the guts to admit my edging session.

Here are some of the pics that spoke to me.

Getting More & More Desperate

As I work on my 10th week of chastity and orgasm denial I am getting more and more desperate.  My thoughts, wishes and desires are getting more and more extreme.  I can't imagine how much worse this can get, but at the same time I want it to get much worse.

Tomorrow I go out of town for a few days for work.  I will be locked up for this trip for it's entirety.  Normally when I travel, Mistress would give me an orgasm before I left or have me masturbate to completion in my hotel room.  The intent was to make sure that my horniness was reduced dramatically.  I was also made to cum into a pair of panties that later served as a gag for me.  Gross, but so hot.  Since I was left to my own devices, I would pretty much edge myself many, many times before orgasm.  Essentially I was a greedy, selfish masturbator.  Another negative effect was that I would be an asshole when I returned and frequently during my trip.  The effect of orgasms while traveling was not a positive one.

I am excited to be locked up on this trip.  If I am going to be locked in chastity for the rest of my life, it's necessary to figure out how to stay chaste while apart from my Mistress.  This week will be a real mindfuck as I am so used to being able to touch myself while traveling that I really won't know what to do with myself.  The frustration will be maddening.  The denial and frustration should also keep my behavior in check and Mistress at the top of my mind.

Added to chastity, my toenails are once again painted.  It's kind of a shock to my eyes as it's been so long since I had them painted.  It certainly flips a switch in my brain every time I see them.  Mistress will be packing a nighty for me to wear which will just add to my frustration.  As of now, I know of nothing else Mistress has planned for me.  I was going to include a list of ideas, but that's getting a little to 'pushy bottom' for me.

Overall I am so sexually frustrated that my head is spinning, but I wouldn't want it any other way.

Below is a task Mistress gave me on a previous trip.  There won't be any touching this trip.       

Wrecked

This morning I woke up with the lingering effects of a tease and torture session with Mistress last night.  Mistress and I went out with friends for happy hour and on our way home Mistress told me she was going to make me pay for recent transgressions.  When we got home, Mistress instructed me to put on some music and for me to take off my chastity device and clean up her cock.  While I did that, Mistress got out some implements for pleasure and for pain.  

As I was putting my restraints on, Mistress had me put the big rubber bands on my thighs.  I really wish I never introduced those evil rubber bands to her.  Once my restraints were on, Mistress tied me down spread-eagle to the bed and blindfolded me.  The first thing Mistress did was put her lips on her cock.  It had been so long since I have had any sensation on her cock, the sensation was kind of confusing, but it did feel good.  Next Mistress clamped my nipples with something but I wasn't sure if it was clothespins or clover clamps, but the first one she put on was just on the tip and it hurt for more than the one that had a bit more skin.  I tried to suck it up and deal with it but I had to ask her to reposition it which she did.  Mistress didn't leave them on very long and when she removed them the pain was intense.  Unfortunately I can't feel any residual pain this morning.  There is something very hot about having nipple pain for a day or 2 after a scene.

Mistress also put a glass dildo up my ass and held the Hitachi to it.  It seems like it was against my prostate. I thought for sure that I was going to have cum milked out of me or have an actual anal orgasm.  I think Mistress' goal was to have me leak enough to have something to eat, but I was able to resist.  I forget how much I love having something in my ass.  I feel like such a slut as I try to take it deeper.

The rest of our scene is a blur to me as I got super high off of the combination of happy hour drinks and the endorphins from her abuse.  For about an hour, Mistress edged me multiple times.  She also snapped the rubber bands multiple times of which I have some nice residual marks.  My balls were smacked multiple times while I got scolded for my recent attitude.  The worst part is that Mistress kept me from enjoying any part of her body.  I begged for kisses, or to taste her but she refused my requests.  As best as I can tell she didn't even pleasure herself.  

During this time we discussed a plan for correcting my recent attitude.  Mistress and I are now working together in a new business venture.  I have a lot of experience in this industry and Mistress is new.  I find myself getting frustrated and I end up speaking in a disrespectful manner as well as talking down to Mistress.  This is a behavior that I hate about myself and I seriously want it corrected.  Once the plan is formalized, I will post it here.  

When Mistress was done torturing me, she undid 2 of my limbs and went to the rest room.  I undid my right hand and proceeded to edge myself one more time before she got out of the bathroom.  She had me lock myself back in chastity and then had me clean the room.  While cleaning the room I had to try something out.  I was able to edge myself one more time by holding the Hitachi against my cock cage.  We might have to disable the Hitachi 😊  

The rest of the night I was an absolute mess.  The bondage, the pain, and the edging left me in a hyper sexualized state.  I kept feeling the urge to grab her cock and get myself off, but I couldn't due to the device locked on my cock.  I don't think I will ever be unlocked again.  

We proceeded to discuss the plan to correct my misbehavior while working together.  I assured her this is something I not only want, but I need.  I have agreed that whatever she needs to do me I will accept.  I want to be owned and I cannot be owned if I treat her this way.  I said I doubted her resolve to do this.  Mistress assured me that she did, so long as I was serious about changing.  Mistress commented that she will start making me kneel when I get out of line.  That's probably one of the hottest things she has ever said to me.  Mistress isn't a big fan of kneeling but I now believe she sees how it can 'take me down a notch' and put her in a superior position.

As I was waking up this morning, I was still feeling the powerful effects last night.  I am so horny and desperate, it's making my head spin.  I so want to touch Mistress' locked cock.  I so want to service Mistress all day long with massages, painting her toenails and by giving her orgasms.  I so want to be dressed up as a little whore sissy.  I so want to be locked in a straight jacket and put away for the day.  I so want to have my current state used to push me further into submission.  I am wrecked and I love it.  

           

Harsh Treatment - Yay!

Mistress and I recently had an anniversary.  Last night Mistress gave me a very memorable anniversary scene.

We came home after a couple drinks at a local bar.  We both had the right amount of buzz in us.  Mistress said she wanted to tie me up and I was more than happy to oblige.  Looking back through the blog, the last time I was tied up was March 28th.  I ran upstairs to take a shower and Mistress got out some champagne.  After my shower I got our bed ready for our adventure.  I pulled the restraints out from under the mattress, and put towels on the bed.  I pulled out all of the toys and laid them on the dresser.  I put on 2 ankle and 2 wrist restraints.  I put a large rubber band around each thigh as well as a blindfold over my eyes.  I proceeded to tie 3 of my limbs so Mistress would only have to restrain one.

Mistress came upstairs.  She finished tying me up.  It was then that I realized I had forgotten to put my perfume on.  I mentioned it to Mistress and she grabbed a pair of panties out of my panty drawer.  She sprayed a bit on the pair of panties and then put them around my head and over my nose.  I was instantly in a trance.  I can't explain it, but that perfume does that to me.

Mistress also added extra rubber bands to my thighs before tying me back down.  I don't remember the exact order of events, as it is now a blur, but I was well used.  Before the scene was over Mistress had massaged my prostate with her fingers.  She had inserted a dildo in my ass (unfortunately she wasn't wearing it).  I had clothespins on my balls and my nipples (my favorite).  She managed to hit me in the balls more times than I can count all while stroking my cock with a well lubed hand and a Hitachi vibrator.  I have multiple bruises on my thighs of where the rubber bands inflicted their excruciating pain.

Mistress had me so worked up that I was running at the mouth with confessions of how badly I wanted to be treated.  Everything ended with Mistress making me cum against my wishes.  Even though I came hard it was also a ruined orgasm.  She stopped or slowed down a bit when I started cumming so I lost that complete drain that can happen and then she kept stroking me to where I was laughing hysterically.  I was spent.  Or so I thought.  I woke up early this morning completely on 10 again.  I wanted to wake Mistress up and have sex but also want her to sleep.  My mind is racing with thoughts and I can't stop it.  Here are some of the thoughts I had while being tortured and some follow up thoughts.

• Feminization.  I begged for more and more feminization and I believe Mistress will enforce it.  Failure to either follow instructions or self feminize myself will be dealt with harshly.  I hope.
• This post https://missbossybitchsboy.blogspot.com/2017/08/enroute.html caused Mistress to comment on it last night.  I imagine coming home to an outfit by the door as soon as I enter the house.  Or a butt plug, chastity device, restraints, or certain notes.  I can't even enter the house without following the instructions first.  So hot!
• Harsher treatment.  Mistress was pretty mean last night with her actions as well as her comments.  I would like to be able to say I was scared or taken back by it, but I wasn't.  I am absolutely enthralled by it.  I begged to be treated as harshly as possible.  The thought of actually safe-wording or begging for less harsh treatment makes my cock hard.  If Mistress can get me to dread something in the D/s realm, she will have done something I didn't think could be accomplished.
• Scent training.  My perfume is working well.  I also begged Mistress to scent train me in other ways.  I imagine being restrained and having her socks or panties after she works out being put into my mouth and over my nose.  I can't explain why, but the idea turns me on so much.
• Order.  Being ordered to do things.  Being made to wake up to make Mistress her coffee.  Being made to change outfits throughout the day.  Being told to fetch items upstairs, not because Mistress is lazy, but to keep me obeying without question.
• The cage.  I get the feeling I will be experiencing the cage again soon.  Mistress seems to like it and I can't argue with its effectiveness, especially when combined with other items (straight jacket, heels, bondage, etc.)
• Chastity - More of it.
• Shocking collar.  I mentioned using it and Mistress seemed to agree in another context.  The thought makes me shudder.
• Challenges.  I am dreaming of Mistress making me do things with the sole intent of trying to get me to say 'no' and then punishing me for saying no.  

  In closing, Mistress has me so worked up with how she treated me last night and her comments make me hope for most of what she said to come true.  That would be heavenly.

On the road

I'm currently on the road for work.  Mistress made sure to keep me in check.  I have my toenails painted pink and I am in a nighty.  She also gave me permission to edge, but not cum.

Before I left home I downloaded some videos to a flash drive to play on my personal PC. I picked out a video figuring I would edge a bit before going to bed.  What I found was that the text on the video got me so wound up that I wanted to cheat and cum.  Instead I decided to divert my energy to a blog post and use it to keep me wanting to be a horny little slut that purposely denies my own orgasms.

Here are some screen captures of the video and the words that got me so wound up.

True...

She took a good long time to milk his prostate with a prostate toy.  This technique definitely works, you just have to be patient.  There is no joy in it from the submissive's perspective.  He is drained without even coming close to orgasm.

I clearly have the feminization trigger. 

Nothing like sucking on a big dildo. Check out those eyelashes.

I love the last sentence.  I so want to be degraded in a way that would make Mistress happy.

A high heel in the ass.

I think prostate milking is even worse since there is no pleasure.  At least with a ruined orgasm you get close to orgasm.

As soon as she gets a bit of cum to come out, she stops edging him and then twists and squeezes his balls draining them of cum.  The pain looks terrible, but effective.  He wishes he didn't leak.

Me wanting to cum so bad, but wanting to deny myself even more.  I love having my toenails painted.  I have to be very careful this time of year to not get caught.