Sunday, December 31, 2017

Wrecked

This morning I woke up with the lingering effects of a tease and torture session with Mistress last night.  Mistress and I went out with friends for happy hour and on our way home Mistress told me she was going to make me pay for recent transgressions.  When we got home, Mistress instructed me to put on some music and for me to take off my chastity device and clean up her cock.  While I did that, Mistress got out some implements for pleasure and for pain.  

As I was putting my restraints on, Mistress had me put the big rubber bands on my thighs.  I really wish I never introduced those evil rubber bands to her.  Once my restraints were on, Mistress tied me down spread-eagle to the bed and blindfolded me.  The first thing Mistress did was put her lips on her cock.  It had been so long since I have had any sensation on her cock, the sensation was kind of confusing, but it did feel good.  Next Mistress clamped my nipples with something but I wasn't sure if it was clothespins or clover clamps, but the first one she put on was just on the tip and it hurt for more than the one that had a bit more skin.  I tried to suck it up and deal with it but I had to ask her to reposition it which she did.  Mistress didn't leave them on very long and when she removed them the pain was intense.  Unfortunately I can't feel any residual pain this morning.  There is something very hot about having nipple pain for a day or 2 after a scene.

Mistress also put a glass dildo up my ass and held the Hitachi to it.  It seems like it was against my prostate. I thought for sure that I was going to have cum milked out of me or have an actual anal orgasm.  I think Mistress' goal was to have me leak enough to have something to eat, but I was able to resist.  I forget how much I love having something in my ass.  I feel like such a slut as I try to take it deeper.

The rest of our scene is a blur to me as I got super high off of the combination of happy hour drinks and the endorphins from her abuse.  For about an hour, Mistress edged me multiple times.  She also snapped the rubber bands multiple times of which I have some nice residual marks.  My balls were smacked multiple times while I got scolded for my recent attitude.  The worst part is that Mistress kept me from enjoying any part of her body.  I begged for kisses, or to taste her but she refused my requests.  As best as I can tell she didn't even pleasure herself.  

During this time we discussed a plan for correcting my recent attitude.  Mistress and I are now working together in a new business venture.  I have a lot of experience in this industry and Mistress is new.  I find myself getting frustrated and I end up speaking in a disrespectful manner as well as talking down to Mistress.  This is a behavior that I hate about myself and I seriously want it corrected.  Once the plan is formalized, I will post it here.  

When Mistress was done torturing me, she undid 2 of my limbs and went to the rest room.  I undid my right hand and proceeded to edge myself one more time before she got out of the bathroom.  She had me lock myself back in chastity and then had me clean the room.  While cleaning the room I had to try something out.  I was able to edge myself one more time by holding the Hitachi against my cock cage.  We might have to disable the Hitachi 😊  



The rest of the night I was an absolute mess.  The bondage, the pain, and the edging left me in a hyper sexualized state.  I kept feeling the urge to grab her cock and get myself off, but I couldn't due to the device locked on my cock.  I don't think I will ever be unlocked again.  

We proceeded to discuss the plan to correct my misbehavior while working together.  I assured her this is something I not only want, but I need.  I have agreed that whatever she needs to do me I will accept.  I want to be owned and I cannot be owned if I treat her this way.  I said I doubted her resolve to do this.  Mistress assured me that she did, so long as I was serious about changing.  Mistress commented that she will start making me kneel when I get out of line.  That's probably one of the hottest things she has ever said to me.  Mistress isn't a big fan of kneeling but I now believe she sees how it can 'take me down a notch' and put her in a superior position.





As I was waking up this morning, I was still feeling the powerful effects last night.  I am so horny and desperate, it's making my head spin.  I so want to touch Mistress' locked cock.  I so want to service Mistress all day long with massages, painting her toenails and by giving her orgasms.  I so want to be dressed up as a little whore sissy.  I so want to be locked in a straight jacket and put away for the day.  I so want to have my current state used to push me further into submission.  I am wrecked and I love it.  

           

Saturday, December 30, 2017

Chastity. Device vs. No Device

I have been locked in chastity now for 36 days.  Out of those 36 days I have been out of chastity for about a total of 1 hour for Mistress to use her cock.  That's 864 hours that I have been locked with one hour of freedom.  This is a record for me as far as continuous wearing of a device.

It's been 38 days since I have had an orgasm.  That's my 4th longest orgasm free period in my life and a bit more than half way to a new record of denial.

This recent experience has reshaped my ideas on chastity devices.  Here is a synopsis.

Chasity without a device.  I have gone long periods of denial without a device.  As I have stated previously, I am pretty reliable when it comes to the honor system.  But even 99% reliable is still for 3-4 unauthorized orgasms a year or a 25% failure rate if allowed to orgasm 12 times a year.  Without a device, denial without some sort of constant reminder, becomes easy to forget.  It's easy to feel asexual instead of hyper sexual.  Without a device I am occasionally tempted to touch myself, especially when I am in bed alone after Mistress has already gotten up or when Mistress leaves the house for work.  While I do my best to avoid an unauthorized orgasm I sometimes go too far and end up with a ruined orgasm.  I know for a fact that I would have edged myself on at least 4 different occasions over the last 36 days if I were not locked up.  I would also be highly tempted to masturbate as soon as possible after a long denial period or a ruined orgasm.  One benefit of not wearing a device is that my wardrobe choices are unlimited.  Sexual spontaneity is another plus for not wearing a device.

Chastity with a device.  Now that I have fully submitted to the idea of wearing a device I can be a lot more candid about it.  First off, a device makes me hyper sexual.  I cannot stop thinking about my situation.  From the second I wake up, to using the rest room, to bathing, to dressing, to sitting, to standing, to driving, to shopping, to going out with friends, to staying at home and watching TV, to sleeping, there is barely a minute that goes by that I don't feel sexually submissive.  The accommodations I have to make, makes it certain that I cannot forget that I am a chastity slave.  I cannot absentmindedly touch myself, therefore any sensation my cock gets, can only be because Mistress allows it.  Just yesterday morning, Mistress was out of bed before me.  Without thinking, I reached down to give my cock a little squeeze.  Instead of the feeling I was expecting, my hand grabbed my device.  My brain was confused for a split second as the expected sensation wasn't there.  Instead of a physical sexual response, I ended up with a mental submissive/slave response.  I groaned in frustration while at the same time being highly satisfied that I was locked up and under Mistress' control.

I can also not discount the mind-fuck aspect of being locked in chastity.  Last weekend Mistress and I were out and we ran into a woman that we knew from our circle of friends.  We were chatting and she joked and asked us if we wanted a threesome with her.  It may not have been a joke, as we strongly believe that she has been in a couple of threesomes with other couples we know.  While I might fantasize about being in a threesome, the biggest thrill I got out of it was being propositioned for a threesome while being locked in chastity.  If she only knew.

Another mind-fuck aspect is being locked when Mistress and I are not getting along.  It's hard to have the upper hand in an argument when she holds the hey to your cock.

I cannot be trusted on the honor system if total control is what Mistress wants.  While I strive for denial and can achieve it, I don't have enough self control.  While edging on my own and having an accident can likely be forgiven, my biggest chastity crime cannot.  When I am granted an orgasm after long denial periods, Mistress feels generous and will let me stay unlocked for a period of time.  Overnight or even a few days.  This is actually the most dangerous time to let me out.  After a long denial period and especially after a ruined orgasm I am at my most disobedient.  I will sometime purposely give myself a quick, full, satisfying orgasm.  Being locked up immediately after an orgasm does 2 things.  It keeps me from cheating and it gets me ramped back up much faster.     

For those Mistresses that want to completely own their slave, I am of the opinion that a device is necessary.  Even if your slave is 100% honest and chaste, a device makes being chaste a 110% situation.  You can always unlock your slave every day for teasing or for pleasing, and lock him right back up. 



Here's a question for those reading this post.  How do you feel about chastity devices and what other aspects of being chaste can you expand on?         

  

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Behavior Modification

The other night I had a dream about our D/s lifestyle.  I was going to write about it yesterday, but by the time I got home my libido was worn off and I didn't have the guts to do it.  This morning, I am in an extra state of horniness and my perfume has amplified it, so now I an recount my dream.

In my dream Mistress has me sitting on the floor in front of our couch.  I don't know if I am sitting or if I am keeling.  Mistress alternates between walking around me lecturing me and sitting on the couch looking me in the eyes.

She says something to the effect of "you need more control in your life and I am going to give it to you.  I am going to use my position over you to change your behavior.  I am going to start with 3 behavior modifications, but don't worry, it will be many more than that very soon."

She continues, "the first thing we are going to change is your foul mouth.  Starting now you are forbidden from swearing.  I don't really care whether you swear or not, but this is about control.  I want you thinking at all times to be careful what comes out of your mouth.  Anytime you swear, you will be punished.  If you swear and use a derogatory word for a woman, you will be punished in a much more extreme fashion.  Male slaves don't get to call women names."  Apparently me being called out by Mistress for calling a bad woman driver a twat got into my dreams.


She continued with her speech.  "The 2nd behavior we are going to change is your driving.  I am no longer going to beg and plead with you to drive in a manner that doesn't scare me.  Starting today, when I tell you to drive safer you will not talk back and you will immediately change the way you are driving.  Your driving often scares me.  If you try to drive that way any more, it's you who will be scared and fearful."

"Lastly we are going to change how much you drink.  I am not anti-alcohol, this is again about my control over you.  Starting today, you will ask for permission to drink any alcohol.  This includes when we go out.  You will also ask for permission any time you would like a refill.  Expect me to say 'no' often.  Expect me to let you have one or 2 and then no more.  Expect me to have you serve me wine while you are forbidden to drink anything.  The best part is that we will use D/s to make you healthier."

The dream has one more element to it, but it kept changing as I had the dream.  Mistress told me that I would be wearing a uniform around the house at all times.  The uniform started as something you would expect a guy to wear in gym class or basic training.  A white shirt, white shorts white socks and tennis shoes.  It was meant to signify my training.  The other outfit was a maids dress, but not the kind one would fantasize about.  It was meant to signify my service to her in a non-sexual way.


Mistress also told me that I am to wear a pink collar with a bell on it whenever I am home to remind both her and me of my place in our relationship.  



I awoke from the dream aroused but confused.  The dream was completely non-sexual.  There was no real D/s element to it other than what was threatened.  I am certain the arousal came from the control aspect of it since it was not really sexual in any way.  It's also possible the arousal was due to my chastity device that has not been removed for nearly a week, and that was just to change devices.  

As I tried to fall back to sleep, my mind raced with the thought of Mistress implementing these changes or others she may have up her sleeve.  The idea of using my submissiveness to her (and our) benefit is hot.  Changing some of my core behaviors to make them less annoying to her or even non-existent is a submissive man's dream.  Or at least this submissive man's dream.     


       
If you enjoy reading this blog, please leave a comment.  Mistress and I enjoy reading the comments, ideas and feedback from our audience.  I will reply to everyone as soon as I can. 


Sunday, December 24, 2017

Chastity Dilemma

Mistress and I are heading out of town for a couple days for Christmas.  We've done the family Christmas and are going to a hotel for a couple of days.

Mistress has already commented that she plans on using her cock while we are away.  She mentioned that she may unlock me for the whole time we are gone, but I'd rather that not happen. In my world, the best case is for me to be locked and only taken out for her use.  In Mistress case, having my cock right there whenever she wants is her best case.  Since I have already confessed that I have masturbated on trips without her knowledge, this is not the best scenario.  Here are some of the options that I see for our weekend.

  • Mistress unlocks me for the entire trip.  I want to remain orgasm free as long as possible, so cheating will not be something that happens.  What could happen however, is that when Mistress is asleep, I will be feeling the cock I haven't felt for an entire month.  That will progress into edging that I may not be able to stop in time.
  • Mistress unlocks me just for sex.  We lose some spontaneity, but I have no way to touch myself and we Mistress maintains 100% control over my cock.  My only fear in this scenario is accidentally orgasming while having sex.  
  • Mistress leaves the keys at home.  We take the Hitachi, a strap-on and any other toys she wants and I can pleasure her while I get nothing.  I could use the strap-on and fuck her for as long as she wants with no risk of me cumming.  Also, I could spend a lot of time with my face between her legs.  As a bonus, Mistress could use the strap-on on me while I am locked.  Talk about a mind-fuck.
  • Lastly, Mistress could keep me unlocked during waking hours and locked when she is sleeping.  She could wear the key on a necklace or safety pin it to her pillow so that she has readily access to the key.  The only downside to this is if she fell asleep before me.
I am always amazed at how going to a hotel seems to release inhibitions and make sex much easier to accomplish that when we are at home.  I am sitting here fantasizing about the above items as well as other things such as wearing some naughty items under my clothes.  Me bringing some restraints on our trip and Mistress tying me to the bed while she goes to the lobby bar.  It makes me think of us finding a 3rd person for a threesome or making me dress in full femme and being made to walk down a hall and back.  Hotels seem make my already depraved brain even more depraved.  No matter what happens we will have a great time!

Merry Christmas to all of my readers. 


Saturday, December 23, 2017

Desperation

It's now been 31 days since my last orgasm and I have been in chastity 100% of the time for the last 29 days.  My only release was for about 20-30 minutes 2 different times, when Mistress wanted to use the cock she owns for her pleasure.  I was wisely locked back up immediately after each use.  The longer I go, the more desperate I become and the more I want to be treated cruelly.

This morning I put a light spray of the perfume Mistress bought for me last year around this time. I have worn it nearly every day since then and it still has an amazingly powerful effect on me.  For example with morning I sprayed it on and within seconds my libido went up, my head spun in a sub-space-y kind of way and I immediately linked it having to do something feminine.  I am very much conditioned to equate the smell of the perfume with having to wear something feminine.  It also goes deeper and triggers a drop in my male attitude.

All of that being said, I live for not being in control of something so basic as my own pleasure. I love the idea of being fully owned. I am intoxicated on hormones and endorphins.  I am becoming addicted to the mix of it all. Addicted.



If you enjoy reading this blog, please leave a comment.  Mistress and I enjoy reading the comments, ideas and feedback from our audience.  I will reply to everyone as soon as I can. 

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Staying the course

Yesterday I had an overwhelming day.  Work is busy.  I had tech issues which frustrate me to no end because I am fairly tech savvy.  The day went too fast.  I was in a super foul mood.  Unfortunately I was frustrated and short with Mistress for no good reason.

Mistress and I were supposed to go out yesterday afternoon for an evening networking event for her business.  Logistically it wasn't going to work for me, but with my attitude it wasn't going to work for Mistress either, so she ended up going alone.

Not long after she left the house, I got a text from her.  "If I had more time, you would have been locked in the cage all night"

"I could see that" I replied.

"The dry cleaning should be ready" she texted back, which I took to be an order as well as a test.

"I'll go get it" I texted back.

I ran that errand and picked myself up something to cook for dinner.  In addition to that errand I made sure to straighten up the kitchen, do dishes, and get her coffee pot ready for this morning in case she got up before me.  I thought there was a good chance that I was going to be locked in the cage or banished to the spare bedroom if she had enough reason to do so.  Instead, Mistress had a great evening and seems to have forgiven me for my attitude yesterday.  However she did mention a caning is certainly possible moving forward.

When we were getting ready for bed, she indicated that her first inclination was to text me and tell me that D/s would ending until things improved.  She decided that instead of that she could punish me, instead of changing our dynamic.  I thanked her for changing her mind and staying the course.

It's tough when things aren't going right.  When I get mad, I want out of chastity, I push back on anything feminine Mistress wants me to do and I revert back to my macho side that I hate.  Mistress gets frustrated and wants no part of owning me.  We lose lots of ground in our female led relationship.

What is really cool is when we overcome this challenge.  I stay locked in chastity, I suck it up and dress however I am supposed to, I lose my ability to resist.  Mistress punishes me or turns the screws on me even more, to enforce her ownership over me and her intolerance of my insubordination.  Our D/s dynamic gets stronger because we pushed through.  It's not easy, but I am glad we are getting better at doing it.  I am owned more than I ever thought possible.




If you enjoy reading this blog, please leave a comment.  Mistress and I enjoy reading the comments, ideas and feedback from our audience.  I will reply to everyone as soon as I can. 

 

Monday, December 18, 2017

A car ride

Yesterday morning I had dressed up in comes casual but feminine clothes.  They were not overt items, unless someone was paying attention.  I had a few hours to myself before Mistress got up.  When she did get up she asked to run a couple errands.  Both errands were just going through the drive through of 2 different establishments.  I started to change clothes and Mistress said I should go as I was dressed.  I thought about it for a second and decided it was worth a try.  I did put on a jacket as it was pretty cold, but looking back I wish I didn't have that option.  I took my SUV which sits higher and has tinted windows.  Looking back (in my current, super horny state), I should have taken her car for added humiliation.  Her car sits much closer to the ground and the windows aren't tinted.  Someone would have easily been able to see my denim cropped pants.  Between the 2 places I went to, I would have been much more self-conscious of my situation.  Since I was dressed in a manner that would have been obvious had I had to get out of the car, I made sure to drive slow, and very carefully.  No need to get pulled over or end up in a fender bender and have the police called.  The riskiest part of my adventure was walking out to my SUV as I have to walk behind it with the garage door open to get into it.

Later Mistress asked me how it was, I told her it was perfect for a first try out in public.  She mentioned the word 'conditioning' as though she is conditioning me to get used to the idea of going out.  She said she was surprised that I went out dressed the way I was.  I like to think that I didn't have an option.  I like to think that if I told her I was still going to change into male clothes, that she would have forced the issue and made me leave the house like that. If I refused there would be consequences.  I like to think that my next trip out will have me in more feminine attire with something very obvious. My head is spinning in sub-space with the idea.



I spent the rest of the morning dressed feminine and after we ran an errand in the afternoon, I was dressed masculine the rest of the day.  Mistress is correct.  I am much more agreeable and considerate in my feminine attire.  There is something very powerful that happens inside my mind when the clothes go on.


I wish I would have remembered to take a picture of myself.  Instead I found a couple online.




If you enjoy reading this blog, please leave a comment.  Mistress and I enjoy reading the comments, ideas and feedback from our audience.  I will reply to everyone as soon as I can.  
       

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Falling deeper

I's been 25 days since my last orgasm and 23 days since I have been locked in chastity 24/7 except twice when Mistress let me have sex with her.  I am now really starting to feel the desperation of teasing and denial.  Not so much because of the length of time I have been denied, but because twice in the last week Mistress has used me for her pleasure and locked me back up.  The edging and her comments have me very, very ramped up.  Add the hangover I have this morning from a late night Christmas party and I am an absolute hot mess.  My mind is spinning with some of the most depraved things I can think of.

When I woke up this morning I sprayed on my perfume and almost instantly I went from looking for my male pajamas to going into the spare bedroom and throwing on a pair of panties, capri length jeans and a feminine top.  I wanted to wear something much more feminine including heels, but am also back to being insecure without Mistress' encouragement.

While I was getting dressed I found a pair of black jeans that I forgot I bought.  They are tight and have sparkles on the back pockets. It's then that I thought of going out dressed in public.  I imagined having to go wash Mistress's car and having to dry it off.  I would wear and outfit and makeup that would could pass for male clothes unless someone was paying extra attention.  Starting me off slow and getting me used to the idea of being dressed in public vs having me go out full femme for my first time.

Then my brain, being what it is, had me fantasizing about going to a party later today with naughty items (clothes or toys) under my clothes. It's fantasizing about doing chores at Mistress command.  It's fantasizing about total surrender.  It's thinking about the next two weeks, us both working from home and me not needing to be anywhere and Mistress using me up.  It's fantasizing about what an orgasm would feel like, knowing I don't really want one.

All of that being said, it's a damn good thing I am locked up right now.  If not I know that I would be edging myself to all of the thoughts I am having.  It's starting to be a real mind-fuck when I reach down expecting to have my cock feel my touch and it feels nothing.  It's amazing knowing that my pleasure is 100% dependent on Mistress and there is nothing I can do to change it.

I am going to sign off now.  As a note to my readers, I truly appreciate the recent comments.  It makes my blogging much more fulfilling.

Here is my mood today.



   

Saturday, December 16, 2017

A plan for my next orgasm.

Last night was another night of Mistress using me in a way that is good for both of us.  Our evening consisted of happy hour, and some time home with the pets.  We went to bed at a decent hour and while we were getting ready Mistress started asking me some questions. Mistress started by asking me how long I could go without an orgasm before I started having a bad attitude.  To me this was an interesting question. 

There are clearly examples of men that get resentful when they don't cum.  I am not one of those men.  I told Mistress so long that there was ample teasing and interaction that I could go a very long time without an orgasm.  And when I say teasing, it doesn't necessarily have to be physically teasing my cock, although that would be nice.  It could be mental teasing.  Comments, text messages, and other sorts of non-physical teasing are very powerful.  Without some sort of acknowledgement and encouragement of chastity play, then I would eventually get resentful, but not due to lack of cumming. 

She asked again how long I could go without an orgasm.  I told her I could likely go a year.  Then I lowered that to once a quarter.  Now it;s not that I can't go a year without an orgasm, I can.  My only concern with long term denial is that I may forget how good an orgasm feels, and then I won't be as motivated to chase that orgasm if I forget how they feel.  That being said, I do believe that frequent edging can make long term orgasm denial (longer than 90 days at a time) possible.  Edging does 3 things.  It reminds the body of what an orgasm will feel like, but at the same time it removes the let down of an orgasm.  The 3rd item is the mind-fuck that occurs by being edged and locked back up.  It's incredibly powerful.

Mistress told me to think about what dates I wanted to have my orgasms.  I suggested she might not have the dominant desire to keep me denied long term and that she would have to enforce 24/7 chastity.  She assured me that she can so long as she gets to have as much pleasure as she wants.  By this point my cock was straining against my chastity cage.  I was in heaven.  Here I was locked up and being told I was going to go a very long time without an orgasm, but she would be using me.

Mistress then told me to put some towels on the bed as she was going to use me.  At first she didn't unlock me.  That made my head spin even more.  She soon relented and had me unlock my cock.  As I entered her pussy, I was amazed at how good it felt.  It's only the 2nd time in 22 days that my cock has felt any sensation.  I slipped deeper into sub-space by knowing I was going to be used for Mistress' pleasure.

As soon as I was inside Mistress she started being very rough with my nipples.  Not too rough as I am not feeling any residual pain this morning.  She started teasing me about the date I would choose for my next orgasm. Would it be Valentines day?  I said that day is for her, not for me.  Besides I want to make sure this period of denial would be the longest of the last 35 years of my life.  My current record of no orgasms was set on March 26th of this year when I went 72 days without an orgasm.  That means I would need to go to at least  February 4th to beat my old record.  So technically Valentines day could work, but I chose March 31st.  That would be 129 days or 4 months and 9 days.  Can we do it?

I wasn't inside Mistress for very long before I was on the edge.  Mistress had me use my fingers on her.  I made her cum in no time.  I was able to put my cock back inside we and we continued to discuss things.  I don't remember the order of things, but here are some of the things that came up.

  • I expressed how happy I am to see Mistress embracing my chastity and her pleasure.
  • Mistress mentioned that I need to start dressing feminine again.  We both believe I am much more submissive and respectful the more feminine I am dressed.  She will need to reset some ground rules for this as I am out of practice and insecure about it (meaner is better).
  • Mistress wants to get me some more feminine outfits.  Looks like a trip to the thrift store soon!
  • With us both working from home now, I can be at her beck and call sexually.  I can be on the floor under her desk with my tongue on her pussy, or I can meet her in the bedroom and make her cum until she is satisfied. 
Mistress again asked me what date I wanted to orgasm.  Then an idea hit me.  What if I didn't get to pick my orgasm directly, but I had to do something very difficult to signify that I was ready to orgasm.  What if I asked to be locked in the cage for 24 hours or longer to signify I wanted an orgasm?  What if I went in public fully cross-dressed to signify I wanted to orgasm.  I was going to mention some other limit pushing ideas, but Mistress jumped on that idea, a little too quickly.  She indicated that I will not be allowed an orgasm until I take her car to go get gas while I am fully feminized.  This idea scares the hell out of me while it excites me to no end at the same time.  A real challenge!

I was able to give Mistress at least 3 squirting orgasms before she was done using me.  I immediately cleaned myself up and locked my cock back up.  I thanked Mistress profusely for using me and denying me.  I went to bed feeling very horny, but also feeling very owned.  Every slaves dream come true.

As I write this I am realizing some challenges moving forward.  For me to get so horny that I will get myself dressed up and go out in public will take some effort on both of our parts.  I will need to again dress so often that I become more comfortable dressed in women's clothes than my male clothes.  Mistress will have to make sure I am aroused and teased out of my mind so that my libido overrides my fear of being dressed in public.  A strict Mistress that uses me for her pleasure while ensuring I don't drip even one drop of cum.  A battle of wills to make me cross this boundary I have in my mind.

Regardless of when my next orgasm is, my goal is to make sure Mistress is fully satisfied.  I would like to be inside her more often so that I can fuck her for as long and hard as she wants without the threat of me cumming to soon.  The lack of stimulation I now get makes me too sensitive to pleasure her properly.  If that doesn't work, I can wear a sheath or condoms to reduce my sensitivity.  The plus side to that is she can monitor if I have any unauthorized spillage.


 

       

      

Friday, December 15, 2017

Obsession and Distraction

Once in a while Mistress will make a comment that triggers something inside me that makes me obsess about it.  Not only do I obsess about it, it tends to take me to places I didn't intend on going.  Here is my latest obsession that drifted into something entirely different. 

A few days ago Mistress mentioned that I should watch my attitude, because being locked in the cage in a straitjacket with the shocking device locked on my balls doesn't sound like too much fun.  I replied something to the effect of "to you it might not sound fun".  Since then I have been obsessing about it.  Not so much about the cage, but about something similar.

My first real thought was me thinking of being put into the straight jacket I would lie in the center of one of our spare beds.  My feet would be tied so I would be forced to lie on my back.  I would be blindfolded with earplugs in my ears with white noise playing.  I would be left like this for hours.  Abandoned. 



Then of course, my mind kept going further down the path.  Instead of just being abandoned I imagined having the E-stim box hooked up to me with one set of wires going into a metal butt plug in my ass and bands around my cock.  Mistress would put the settings on the 'torment' function and leave me while my ass and genital are assaulted with electricity.




Then my mind shifted to back to being abandoned for long periods of time.  My mind went darker and realized that the need to go to the bathroom limits the amount of time a slave can be left alone.  It seems that for long term isolation bondage, diapers are frequently used.  Talk about a mind fuck.  Not only are you restricted from moving, but your can't see or hear.  Now your most basic body function is used in your punishment.  I can only imagine how long I would fight to not relieve my self in such a humiliating fashion.  One could be safely left for hours like this.  The inability to move would be excruciating, in a good sadistic way.  The mental anguish of not knowing the time, how long you will be left there and then having to relieve yourself is a very powerful reminder of the control you have given up.  


When I found the image above, I stumbled across another image that I assume only came up because of the diaper.  Apparently these onsies can be used with diapers for adult baby scenes.  These outfits are for people that have a 'little' fetish.  They are unisex and made for people of ALL sizes.  Now I am not into the adult baby fetish one bit, but these outfits do speak to my feminization and humiliation fetish.  I can imagine having to wear one around the house, to bed at night or in a scene of some sort.  The humiliation factor would be extremely high.  





So there you have a perfect example of how my brain works.  It obsesses, but it's also extremely diverse in what appeals to my submissive side.  


     

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Zap and some comments on breaking.

I have been extra difficult to deal with lately.  Mistress and I are starting to do some work together and we are butting heads.  I tend to get speak in a manner that sounds shirt and harsh.  It's certainly not my intention. Last night was one of these times where we got into a more heated back and forth and Mistress told me to put on my shocking collar.  I didn't say no, but I also didn't put it on.  She didn't press the issue, so I didn't put it on.  Had she insisted, I like to think that I would have obeyed, but she didn't so we didn't test that theory.  I was not ready to put it on just for the sake of getting shocked.  The horse had already left the barn so to speak.

That being said, I am working from home today.  I have put the shocking collar around my balls and locked it with a padlock.  I cannot remove it, and it's installed before we have any issues.  I can see me having to wear this whenever I am home, especially during working hours.  I have such a powerful fear of electricity that I am already aware of any potential tone issues I may have later today.







The other night a comment was left on this blog in response to my request for feedback from readers.  It was from a Mistress that mentioned that she would like to see me post as a broken slave.  I have been thinking of what it would look like for Mistress to break me.  While certain parts of it I can fantasize about, the other thoughts I have are reluctance as I know it would suck on many levels.  I tend to agree with her take however that if somehow Mistress was able to get me to the breaking point, I would likely be at a whole different level of submission.  The thought of enduring whatever Mistress decided to put me through, just to show my devotion as her slave is something that I find extremely hot.  That's definitely one of those 'be careful what you wish for' scenarios. 
 

Monday, December 11, 2017

Used and put away

Last night at bedtime Mistress decided she needed to have an orgasm.  She has me unlock myself and told me I would need to be locked up first thing this morning.  I advised her that may not be a good idea and that it would be best for me to be locked back up immediately after she was done using me.

Mistress just started her period and was a bit insecure about it.  I assured her that I am fine with that and it's easy to clean off if there is an issue.  It felt amazing to be inside Mistress again after more than 2 weeks.  She warned me not to cum.  I assured her I didn't have any intention of cumming.  I was able to hold off from cumming more than I thought I would be able to, but Mistress made it difficult.  She was pinching my nipples nice and hard, hard enough I can still feel it this morning and it makes my cock throb.  She also added some commentary that nearly pushed me over the edge a few times.  I am not sure of the order of her comments, but the few I remember are as follows.


  • This morning I was to put on the shocking dog collar around my balls.  The cage is a great deterrent, but it makes it so she can't use me.  With the shocking collar on my balls she can punish me and keep me close and useful.  


  • I was to start handling the dry cleaning as she no longer wants to do that particular chore.  She also told me that she would be delegating more and more things to me.  


  • She was considering not letting me sleep in our bed at some point in the future.  My head just spun writing that sentence.
  • She is considering having me move the cage into the living room.   
  • My life is about to get tougher. I assured her that is what I am asking for.  

As I kept getting closer to cumming, Mistress didn't want me to have an accident, so she had me use my fingers.  I can make her cum hard and fast using my fingers.  I was in heaven.  Pleasing my Mistress while my cock was being totally ignored.  Making her cum was my only priority, as it should be.

I was able to get her off a couple times and she let me put my cock inside her.  After a short while she told me to get off of her, clean up and lock myself back up.  It was perfect.  I wouldn't have changed a thing.

As I awoke this morning I realized how lucky I was to be locked up again.  Mistress got up before me and the temptation to touch myself would have been too much.  I know I would have tried to edge myself.  I wouldn't have tried to orgasm, as I love the amount of sexual chemicals running through my veins.  I fear that I wouldn't stop edging soon enough and I would have an accident that I would be to embarrassed and scared to admit to Mistress.  Being locked up gave me that extra bit of help I needed.

I love being owned and locked by my Mistress.



   


Sunday, December 10, 2017

The 99.25% Confession

I was reviewing my chastity log to see where I am at in the grand scheme of things.  I am on my 15th day of continuous lockup.  I thought I was close to a record, and I'm not even close.  Here is where things stack up.

Current - 16 days
Sept 27 - Oct 13 - 16 days
August 29 - Sept 14 - 16 days
Dec 18th 2015 - January 16th, 2016 - 29 days.  This occurred after Mistress sent me an email saying we needed to recalibrate our dynamic. - https://missbossybitchsboy.blogspot.com/2015/12/recalibration.html

It appears it will be New Years Eve before I break my old record.  Now to be fair, my previous records were not 100% continuous.  The 16 day periods this year were with me swapping out devices and being free at least once for a few days.  The 29 day period during our re-calibration period had me out overnight once for a party we went to and for sex another time.  As best as I can tell by going back to old posts, I likely stayed locked for 21 days straight at the end of 2015 and into 2016.

What's interesting from back then is that after I was unlocked in January, I was not locked back up until June. For some reason we skipped a whole four and a half months.

Now that it's my goal to stay locked in chastity 24/7/365 (and I yearn for it) it's time for a confession.  If I am not locked up, I am on the honor system for orgasm control.  Restricting my orgasms is is a fetish for me as well as I believe that it's good for our dynamic.  It's something I want badly.  But I am human and not perfect and I surrender to temptation occasionally.  Just doing the math, I am around 99.25% successful on the honor system.  That sounds pretty impressive until you realize that means I
have 2-3 unauthorized orgasms per year.  This number is lower now that Mistress works from home, but it still occasionally happens.  Another way to look at this number is that if I am permitted to cum 20-30 times a year and I add 2-3 extra orgasms, I have a 10% fail rate.

The first way this happens is when I try to edge myself and get carried away.  These generally don't result in a full orgasm as I really do try to stop in time, but far too much cum is released for it not to affect my libido.  The 2nd way this happens is outright cheating.  I purposefully stroke and have have an orgasm, making it quick and satisfying.  When I do this, it's after Mistress has given me an orgasm and my submissive libido is down.  It's more likely to happen after a ruined or less than a fully satisfying orgasm.  I get a taste of what an orgasm is like and I can't handle thinking I won't have one for a long time again.

While I'm at it, I should add that no time is safe.  In fact, more of my cheats have happened while we are on a vacation somewhere.  Mistress and I tend to have sex on vacation (so my submissiveness drops a bit) and when I can't sleep I sneak off to masturbate so I can fall asleep.  Moving forward, going on vacation shouldn't mean a vacation from chastity, especially at night.

I am not proud of my cheating.  I have promised Mistress that 100% of my orgasms are hers to control.  As much as I believe in the honor system, I can't promise that I won't fail in the future.  I am weaker than I thought and apparently need help with control. 










       

 


Friday, December 8, 2017

Posts and/or Quotes that speak to me.

Mistress recently told me that if I link to another page, she generally doesn't go to the link.  So I went though many of the links I have done in the past and put them below.  Some are basic one liners that make my cock hard, others are more in depth and go deeper into my psyche.



He wants you to be his QUEEN, so go ahead and be one.



Do things without particular reason, use your sub in ways you never thought about before. Feel the power, let him feel the loss of it.



Make sure you are served well whenever you feel like being served.






If you are just indulging in your husbands fantasies, and not really taking control by pushing your man into doing uncomfortable things, then you are really again, just being controlled by him.

In order for female dominance to become real, you must make it real, by forcing him to do things that he does not want to do. You will either be done with all of this, or you will have the breakthrough, where you truly have brought your man to his knees in full servitude to you for the rest of your life.

Consider it like breaking a horse or training a dog. Men are no different. They can be trained to submit to your will on all matters but you do have to “break him”.



Take him, break him, mold him, and have a relationship with him, that few ever get to experience.  A relationship that puts you on a pedestal, with him serving you as you wish.  Imagine a relationship, where chores are the mans job, (unless you want to help), orgasms are an obligation for the men to give, and a privilege for him to be granted rarely for exceptional servitude.

This is your world now. You are dominant, and your man is your submissive. He asked for this, but he didn’t realize what it meant. Too bad.



You are now the dominant goddess of the house. What you say goes, is what goes. There are no exceptions. What you want is what you get… Be disciplined with yourself, and do not do things that contradict your dominance.



How nice is it to have an unpaid servant who’s glad to serve you? That is the premise and the promise of a Femdom relationship.






When it comes to chastity, you are not punishing your man - you are protecting him from his perfectly normal lack of self-control.  You are not denying him sexual pleasure. In fact, when you do release him from his male chastity belt, sex will feel better for him and his orgasms will become much more intense.  You are not denying yourself the sex life you deserve. While he’s locked up he’ll use his mouth and fingers to provide you with sexual satisfaction on a regular basis. And, there are ways that you have satisfying penetrative sex while he is still under lock and key…



When done correctly, your man will feel more loved by you than he did before male chastity became a part of your life. In fact, most men eventually thank their wives for insisting on the lifestyle.  While at first you’ll only keep him locked up for a few days at a time, eventually he should be restricted to eight to 12 orgasms a year. This is more than enough.  Over time he’ll start to feel like more of a man, because he’ll know that all of his sexual energy is going towards pleasing you. He’ll like the fact that he no longer feels like a little boy who can’t control himself when you are not looking. Instead, he will be saving himself for you…



Punishments are a very effective tool in a FLR. In fact, I would say a punishment is very powerful when done right. Punishing your husband is essential for keeping the FLR strong. When you administer a punishment, it lets him know there are consequences for bad behavior and it also brings a fierce reality to his submission to you. When he faces the consequences doled out by you, it sends a clear message that this is not all fantasy and that you have authority over him. In my opinion, when you punish your husband and he accepts it, it has a real effect on his psyche which elevates your authority over him and pushes him deeper into submission to you. The ultimate outcome is a husband that is obedient and doing everything possible to make you happy.



Make sex more devotional with less penetrative intercourse. Use his tongue a lot. Just watch how his balls get bigger and bigger. Regularly, leave him frustrated. He’ll be more assertive, more attentive, more eager to please.





Intensifying - whichever action you take, request or carry out, each time you repeat it, intensify it a little bit.



He confesses that he feels humiliated on occasion as I use him for my pleasure leaving him with an engorged penis and my secretions covering his face as I just walk away.  But this dynamic makes him even harder, so I discount it.



Submissive men have a need to serve, they want to be trained, held accountable and punished for their mistakes. This is all part of having a female authority in their lives. And they need the relationship to be real, not some game, something she does just to please him. But men and women think differently and women have a hard time, especially in the beginning, understanding the needs of a submissive man. They tend project their own feelings and their way of thinking into the situation.  Too many women see themselves as mean, selfish, arrogant and cruel. So they struggle to take on the role of the female authority in a femdom marriage …Know this, we are not being mean or selfish or cruel, instead we are giving our men the gift of servitude. Which just happens to be exactly what they want and need.




Your Control over him - It comes in waves, it comes slowly. The best part of it is seeing your sub accepting it, adapting to it and finally handing it over, completely. Even better is seeing him starting to anticipate everything, your wishes, your needs, etc. Even better then that is hearing no complaints, no cry-outs for what he is lacking. And even better then that is the sense of rush hitting your brain every time you realize he will obey anything.



The best way to dominate your man is to make him do things you know he doesn’t want to do, both  in and out of the bedroom.



Male orgasm denial has numerous benefits, but do you know the chemical reasoning behind them? Endorphins, hormones, neurotransmitters, and neurochemicals (neurochemistry) affect how we ALL think and feel. By controlling your mans orgasms, you can control their brain chemicals and can condition (train) them.




Orgasm control is a powerful psychological aspect for a submissive man, and you too will learn to enjoy your teasing and control. It is another important power exchange with you controlling the single physical aspect of maleness that is maleness alone, a hard cock and orgasm at will.


You should orgasm much more than he does. That goes without question, his submissiveness definitely translates into you cumming more. You need to teach him how to orally please you better, and as often as you like.




The more I feminize him, the more submissive and pliable he becomes.  I love watching him do a long list of chores in his maid outfit while I watch my programs.




All I have to do is threaten taking my husband out in his feminine attire and his behavior dramatically gets better.



His smooth muscular chest was covered in a lace corset. His tan athletic shoulders were looming over his constricted waist. All of the places that I held him were covered and pinched. I hadn't realized how much I loved his male body until he dressed as a woman.



Then I pointed to a pink bra on the bed and told him to put it on. He looked at me surprised.  I told him firmly to put it on and not ask questions.



Making him wear panties while caged, was one of the hottest ideas we came up with. You have no idea how extinguishing for his male ego this is, it’s not just a good idea, it’s bullseye.



Back rubs, foot rubs, leg rubs, body massages, anything you think you might like you should try, and then do as much as you like. He loves every minutes of doing anything for you, especially if he is physically close to you.


The only thing standing in your way of having everything you dreamed is your own head. Take your man, boss him around, hurt him, be a bitch. Don’t think about it. Just do it. You will see what happens. He will become more obedient. He will automatically start doing the chores. He will ask you what you need.  He loves you, and wants you to own him. Deep down, he needs to feel loved, wanted, and being your sex toy for some reason, shows him this more than anything else you could do. Because truthfully, a true sub with a woman doesn’t care about the specifics if you do this right, or that you do that right. He cares about you telling him what to do, and him having to comply…



If you want roses, you get them…
If you want back rubs, you get them…
If you want an orgasm, you get it…
If you want to come home to a clean house, you get it…





You may want to put him through a number of tests to ensure he can serve you properly and in all ways. You could include both domestic and intimate tasks. These would test his abilities to maintain the home or bedroom, as well as making sure he can anticipate and satisfy you every need and desire.
You could see if he can provide sexual pleasure for extended periods neither seeking pleasure for himself nor succumbing to his own lust spontaneously, particularly if he has been placed in chastity.



Don’t be afraid to adjust the rules to meet current needs. As people grow, things change. A rule that once made sense, may no longer be required, or perhaps something that was once strict needs to become more lenient (or vice versa).



Once he has had a taste of bliss serving you, and if you work with him, and spend some time training him, and fulfill his needs, all of your dreams will come true.  Dream it, ask it, order him to make it come true, and watch him scramble to make it happen.



You might also wish to assert your Dominance of him by choosing his clothes and other attire. This can include another less obvious collar which could be worn under clothing, cock rings, and chastity devices.



Tell him what to do, and expect him to obey immediately, without question. Remember, if you want him to treat you like a Queen, you have to act like a Queen.



You give him his dream, you receive what most women dream about, unconditional surrender, attention, time and being placed at an invisible pedestal.



I am now thoroughly convinced that no man can be so devoted to a woman as a submissive man can. And lets face it, most women want just that, devotion.



Never take a NO for an answer, never tolerate excuses. Be on top of things all the time. Step by step, disallow whatever you see fit. Train him into unquestionable obedience and humility.



As a service-oriented submissive it is your duty to strive to make the dominants life less stressful and more enjoyable.



In a FLR, discipline is a very important part. Disciplining your male sub, whether it’s about physical or mental, should definitely be presented on daily basis. Real submissive men learn they roles quickly and practically, they do not need discipline to keep them in line. However, levels of submission highly depend on discipline, more precisely the type of discipline.





I therefore suggest, if you are a dominant, you make absolutely clear the pleasure you get from each and every slice of adversity to which you subject your submissive. You can’t be shy about being cruel, about being a sadist. You must be bold about this. Make sure some adversity is simply for your pleasure and nothing more. Your submissive will be further in awe of you if you do. Your submissive will feel even more helplessly under your power.




I highly recommend some type of daily  ritual where the sub is required to do something in a D/s context.  This ritual will help the submissive mentally transition into a true submissive role in the relationship.


A nice benefit of rituals is once a ritual is established, the submissive knows exactly what to do. The Dominant partner does not have to worry about giving commands (unless they are part of the ritual) or telling the submissive what to do.  We have a bath ritual that I just love.    I just have to whisper to him, "get my bath ready."




Kink is certainly are a part of the FLR for many people, including myself, but they are only a small piece of the overall FLR.  The FLR is more about a lifestyle decision to accept the woman as the lead.  It is about the male embracing his obedience to his wife and striving to please her.  Life does get in the way sometimes but in a healthy FLR the underlying dynamic of the FLR remains intact during those busy times. 






I find that regular sessions in our female led marriage keep him from becoming lazy or forgetting his chores and responsibilities.  If I wait too long between sessions, he tends to slack off a bit or become lazy.  It's like maintenance on your car.  You have to take your car in for regular maintenance in order to keep it running in top condition.  You could always skip maintenance but your car will not perform at its best and overtime a break down will occur.  Discipline sessions are what keep your husband serving you at his best and prevent a break down in the relationship from occurring.  With regular discipline you should have less need for punishment.




Once you have established a female led relationship based on previous lessons, body worship is the next step.  Body worship is not a sexual act.  Anything from massage to masturbation or from giving her a bath and washing her hair to painting her nails or helping her shave.  It's about her.



Free Time: how he spends his free time is up to you. If he has been obedient and done all his tasks, you can treat him to a limited time where he gets to do an activity. Make sure he negotiates with you and gives you options. You ultimately decide how he spends his free time. It is important that free time is revoked when he has not been 100% obedient or dutiful. Instead of free time he has then earned corner time when he’s not working for you.





Your husband wants an FLR. But he won’t be able to keep to it at first. It is hard to change habits and develop new habits. You will need something to exert absolute control over him.
In my experience, the best way to control your husband is to take control over his finances. Instruct him to have his paycheck paid into an account you and only you control. Next, have him hand over control of all his accounts bar one. Every month, you can write him a check he can deposit into this account. That way, the worse he performs, the less money he gets and the more he feels his dependency on you.




Rigorously adhering to a schedule of weekly discipline session for a submissive partner is very important.  At a scheduled time each week, you and your partner know that you will have him over your lap, over the back of a chair, or over the edge of the bed for an extended session with the cane or what ever tool you select. This is the session that will fix that laziness and it provides the opportunity for you to vent your frustration – like a discharge of built-up electrical power. When the frustration and irritation is gone the spanking ends, and not before. Whats important here is that this is not ’ play time’ and this is not for his pleasure. Spankings are meant to hurt as your partner is supposed to actually learn from  the lessons you try to teach him.



Man’s greatest motivating force is his desire to please Women… 





Yes.  I have Rules.  And Yes, you will obey them.
And Yes, you will love me for it.
Oh, Yes.



Forced Performances. This is very entertaining and again a low-effort humiliation. Sometimes I like to put on some music and have him dance for me. I’ll make him perform a little strip tease, twerk, etc. Sometimes I will have him masturbate for me. I’ll give directions. (these are great times for video recording)



Spitting. We’re getting a little more extreme here. Don’t be afraid to spit on your male. This can be especially degrading during pegging, even more so during deepthroat training. While he’s making eye contact, just launch a huge wad of spit right in his face. He’ll love you for it! It can also be degrading while you’re criticizing his performance to spit in his face.



He fucking hates this, which is why I love it. Any time he has an orgasm during any femdom activity, he’s eating it or its going on his face. I don’t care where it lands, how he came, if it was an accident, or if he really doesn’t want to. That cum is going in his mouth and down his throat. There are a lot of ways to accomplish this, but I really enjoy planning ahead for it. Its also a huge turn on for him, knowing that he’s going to be forced to eat it, even though immediately after he cums he’s absolutely repulsed by it. 



For added humiliation, I frequently take pictures and video of my pet during these humiliating sessions. I keep these and then use them later for additional humiliation. Seriously, having a video of him, with his face covered in his own semen, apologizing for not deepthroating my strapon well enough, all while dressed in daisy dukes and a bikini top….well that’s just good entertainment. Sometimes I make him watch some of the videos with me and laugh at him. It always results in a giant erection in his pants, haha.



Thursday, December 7, 2017

Slavier

Mistress and I have a fairly equal relationship.  We do a good job of sharing chores around the house.  We outsource cleaning to a cleaning service.  We have our own bank accounts and bills. 

When Mistress was working in a office 50+ hours a week, I worked from home.  I took on much more of the household responsibilities.  I made her coffee most mornings, I made her lunch and I did my best to keep dishes done and dinners planned and prepared.  I was definitely in service mode and most of our friends knew I was the house husband.  Even though it was practical, I was able to twist this into me being her slave, and these were my slave duties. 

For a little more than a year Mistress has been working from home and for the last 6 months I have had to go into the office.  The roles have flipped quite a bit.  Because it's practical.  I still try to make her coffee.  I don't make her lunch and she has been cooking a ton. 

In our day-to-day routine, Mistress treats me well.  Occasionally Mistress will require me to fetch her a drink.  But other than that she doesn't order me around much. 

If I were wired like a typical guy this would all be normal if not expected.  But I'm not wired that way.  Even before puberty, I had fantasies of girls that used me.  When I was younger I would let girls copy my homework.  The girl I lost my virginity to used me in a way that fulfilled my submissive nature.  She was younger than me and more sexually experienced.  She would use me as her chauffeur, for companionship when she got bored and for sex, long after we were no longer dating.  In my early adult years I dated a couple women that would use me for companionship (no sex as much as I tried) and to pick them up if they were out drinking too much and didn't want to drive home.  All of these occurrences made me feel like I was being friend zoned or pussy whipped, but in reality it fed my submissive tendencies.  To be of use and to serve a woman was what was actually happening.  It turns out the women that I dated that treated me well, likely treated me too well.  They didn't use me and therefore it didn't fill that part of me.  I ended up treating them worse than I treated the women that treated me poorly.

That brings me to this part of my life.  I am mature enough to know that being treated well is rare and I am lucky to have it.  Mistress treats we well, but she also doesn't let me get away with treating her poorly.  She can be demanding which obviously fills a need for me.  She can be very nice as well which fills a need for my non-kinky side.

All of that being said, I yearn to be more of a slave to Mistress.  This past weekend Mistress thought we should have some drinks.  I didn't realize it and she went into the kitchen to make them.  When I noticed, I said "don't you think I should be making you a drink?  What good is having a slave if you don't use him?"  She realized that I was right and came back to the sofa to let me serve her.  As it should be. 

Last night I tried to peel some shrimp we were having for dinner.  She wouldn't let me.  We have some stuff going on in our lives that makes me think she is trying to serve me, to show appreciation for some sacrifices I am making for the 2 of us.  While I appreciate the gesture, I would rather she not serve me.  I would rather she make me serve her.

Even though I am older and more mature and I appreciate the balance we have in our relationship, I still want to be used.  It fulfills something deep inside of me.  I want to be used to make her life easier and I even want to be used in ways that tests my willingness to serve.  I am going to list a bunch of ideas down below along with my 'I'm not topping from the bottom' disclaimer.  It's important to note that some of these things seem mean or even bully-ish, but that's if you aren't wired the way I am.  It's like opposite world, nice is mean and mean is nice.

Ideas below - not topping from the bottom.
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I started a list of specific things.  I deleted it.  There is no need for a detailed list.  If Mistress needs ideas there are plenty in this blog, there are plenty in communications we have had over the years, and there are plenty of ideas with a quick search of the internet. 

This is a good synopsis of what I am hoping to communicate with this post.

Chastity - you rule the penis, you rule the man

Power - accept (and use) your power over your slave

Delegate - whatever it is your are doing, decide if your slave should be doing it. Remember, this fulfills him even if he doesn't like the task at hand.

Sexual Satisfaction - make sure you are sexually satisfied, that will satisfy your slave.

Discipline - regular discipline to reinforce your dynamic, daily or weekly as necessary.

Humiliation - can be a fun and effective way to keep the male ego in check

Feminization - keep your slave in a certain state of mind

Subspace - making sure your slave goes into sub-space frequently keeps him grounded

Rituals - set a tone of submission for him