Today's Mood

I am a guy's guy.  I like to workout and I like to have muscles and show them off.  I grow my facial hair even though I think it makes me look older.

Now take that above paragraph and contrast it with how turned on I get thinking about and wearing women's clothes.  Mistress has had me wearing nighties again and I have been wearing panites on my own but even that sometimes makes me insecure.

So although I am conflicted, I have found an amazing Mistress that accepts (and I believe enjoys) seeing me in feminine attire.  It makes my head spin when she gives me feminine orders.

While I like being a very masculine man and wouldn't change that, these guys gurlz make me a little jealous.

Something Bi

Last night I had a dream unlike any I have ever had.  I don't remember a lot, but what I did remember I wanted to tell Mistress this morning but really didn't know how to.  In my dream I remember being in an area with lots of bedrooms, like a small hotel or upstairs in a large house.  I also remember lots of guys and no girls.  In this dream there was a guy in a bed and I was in the bed with him, and I think we were both dressed.  He was already tied, but it's how I wanted him tied.  I had him tied like the picture below, except his arms were tied together behind the head forcing his head up.

I then sat on his chest and unzipped my pants and put my cock in his mouth.  Once it was in his mouth he started sucking me and that's when I noticed I wasn't hard and he wasn't getting me hard.  That's also when I realized that I had done something with another man which I had vowed to never do.  It was such a shock that I woke up from sleeping.

Now while I have no desire to do what I dreamed about, I do like it when Mistress tells me her fantasies of me with men.  It makes me hot to think of her wishing I was giong those things.

Mistress has also been encouraging me to wear nighties at night as well as feminine items under my clothes.  I like it when she teases me and makes me blush by bringing it up.  I like it when she humiliates me.

Too bad I couldn't find a guy on guy version of the picture below.  This was the closest I could find.

A Pleasant Surprise

I think something has gotten into my Mistress.  Last night had a few surprises.  While watching TV, Mistress showed me a couple sex toys that were in an email she got from an online store.  I didn't really think much about it at the time.  Then in bed we were watching another show and since our dog was hogging her side of the bed, Mistress snuggled up to me.  Instead of just watching the show, Mistress started teasing my cock and stroking it.  She was doing such a good job that I'm very surprised she didn't get a bit of pre-cum on her fingers.  She told me she was just going to tease me.  I tried to work my hands onto her body, but she kept me away.  About half way through her tease she commanded me to put on a nighty.  I half-heartedly protested to make sure she was serious.  She was.  I instantly got up and put on a pink form fitting nighty.  My cock was still hard from her teasing.  I got back into bed and Mistress continued her teasing.  After a short while Mistress went back to her site of the bed and told me "have naughty dreams".

Through the night I would wake up to reposition and would always recognize the nighty.  I would have to readjust it or would simply think about the predicament I was in.  I imagined being forced to wear other things at night or under my clothes.  As much as I don't want to wear a nighty (or other things), it's amazing to me how hot it gets me.  It's really about her taking control.

Early this morning Mistress came back from the bathroom.  I wasn't sure if she remembered that I was wearing the nighty, and I was going to try to initiate sex with her.  She reached over and felt my hard-on. She rebuffed my advance by saying "I'm not done teasing and denying you".  That comment went straight to my brain...

I can't recall the last time Mistress made me wear a nighty.  Based on a blog search it was likely back in December.  Her comment about the teasing and denial not stopping really got into my head.  I am really, really worked up this morning and have all sorts of thoughts going through my brain.  I am very fortunate to have such an awesome Mistress.

Hangover / Happy Place

Mistress and I recently went on a trip that involved lots of late nights and heavy drinking.  For that reason I found myself with a hangover 6 mornings in a row.  When I am hungover, I don't want to think about it and want to calm myself with happy thoughts.  The weird part about me is my happy thoughts would probably disturb most other people.  Each morning I would wake up around 7 or 8 o'clock and force myself to go back to sleep.  While forcing myself to go back to sleep, my mind would start racing to keep my mind off my hangover.  The more I thought about things, the more kinky my thoughts became.

Here are many of the things I thought about, not all are included in this list.

Mistress tying me face down and spanking me with a cane until I used a safe-word.  My goal would be to get her to quit before me.  I'd dreamt about my ass being bruised and feeling it every time I sat down for a few days.

I got super hard thinking of Mistress making me suck a dildo until I used safe-word.  I thought about her either using a strap-on or just using her hand, but I would be restrained and she would force the cock in my throat until I gagged.  I thought of getting all sweaty, having tears running down my face and drool dripping out of my mouth and even my nose.  I thought feeling like I was going to get sick.  Feeling my jaw get exhausted.  Knowing I would have a sore throat the next day.  I tried finding a good picture, but all the good ones were of women with a dildo or real cocks.  They had tears running down their faces.  Their makeup was a mess and they had a total look of surrender on their faces.  I fantasized about feeling like that.  Here is the best male sub pic I could find.

I thought about a long painful tease and denial session.  One that would have Mistress having orgasm after orgasm while I got none.  She would get me to "confess" more and more things I would do just to have an orgasm.  Then I imagine it ending one of a few ways.  Mistress making me cum inside her and making me eat it out of her.  Mistress rolling a condom on my cock and either using the hitachi on me or fucking me with the condom on.  Then she would unroll the condom and make me eat all of my cum.  

I fantasized about Mistress picking out more of my clothes on a whim.  For example, one day she might say "let me see your underwear".  Then she would make me go change them.  Or she might make me wear something the back yard that borders on feminine.  Of course there is always nightwear as well.

I also fantasized about Sophia getting a professional makeup/boudoir session.  Based on some of the transformation jobs I have seen I can only imagine how Sophia would look.  Of course, the humiliation of having someone else see me this way would only add to the excitement.  

That's kind of it in a nutshell.  I certainly had many other naughty thoughts over 5 mornings of being hung over.  These are the ones that stick in my mind.  

Another hot post from a blog

This one brought me to the edge many times...

http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2015/04/another-ass-fucking-for-my-husband.html

Another Ass Fucking for my Husband

 That session with Kimberly the other day really renewed my interest in using my big dildo more frequently inside david's mouth and bum, but also in feminizing him for the experience.

Take yesterday, for example. I told him the evening before that we would be having sex yesterday. I told him "sex" would consist of:

1.  Feminized "schoolgirl" dressup for him: panties and bra, big jiggly breast forms, white blouse, short plaid skirt, and lipstick this time, for the cock sucking.

2.  Schoolgirl corner time with anal stretching added.

3.  A good sound spanking from me with belt, paddle, strap, and cane. To tears. Face down on the bed. Skirt raised, panties lowered to his knees, ass and thighs. Ball gagged.

4.  Him on his knees performing oral sex on my strap-on dildo like a pornstar.

5.  Him presenting bottom up to receive a good hard dose of anal intercourse.

6.  Face sitting with his tongue cleaning my asshole, inside and out, as I get myself off with my Hitachi.

7.  If he was a good girl through all this, I would allow him to stand in the corner of the bedroom facing me, lower his panties to his ankles, raise his skirt with one hand, and masturbate to climax while I read my Kindle reader. For inspiration he would be allowed to see my bare breast as he jerked.

8.  Any semen he ejaculated he would catch in his hand, place in his mouth, and swallow.

And you want to know what? Yesterday evening it happened exactly like that!

Isn't it funny how my idea of "sex" has changed so dramatically since I started spanking david a few years ago? I used to be the one dressing up, performing oral sex, and entertaining his penis in my pussy. Oh how the tables have turned!

If I want my boy to dressup as a big-breasted sexy schoolgirl then by goodness he obeys.

If it turns me on to whip his bare ass until the tears flow, he's well marked, and he's begging through his ball gag for me to stop, then by goodness he will submit to that for my pleasure.

If I want to make believe he's a little schoolgirl sucking her first cock, then by goodness he will get on his knees and suck my cock or consequences will be paid in full.

If it turns me on to bend him over the bed, flip his skirt up, remove his panties, and fuck his ass raw, then by goodness he will get his asshole fucked red and raw as the base of that dildo pushes up against my clit.

 And if his tongue cleaning my asshole inside and out makes me cum a little bit quicker with my Hitachi, then he will be on cleaning duty.

Yes, I'll indulge him after I've had my orgasms and allow him to jerk his little penis until it spurts. I'll even show him my bare breast for inspiration. I mean, if a man can't cum to the image and thought of his wife being sexual with him, he has no business cumming at all.

But if he's allowed this privilege he better not get even a single drop of his goo on my carpet! If he does, he'll be on the receiving end of dancing lessons across the back of the living room couch from a doubled-up leather belt every day for a week. And I never, ever go back on my word once a punishment is pronounced.

No, he must catch every drop in his hand, and then transfer it neatly into his mouth. Before he swallows he must crawl over to beside my bed, kneel, and open his mouth to show me the white goo on his tongue.

Then he must swallow it all down under my watchful eye. This is difficult for him. While he looks the part of a slutty, well spanked, well fucked little schoolgirl, swallowing ejaculate is still hard for him, and he hesitated.

We can't have that!

So, this time, to make things a little bit easier for him, I took him across my knee and used a hairbrush on his sore marked up bum while he held his goo tightly in his mouth. The pain and humiliation of a post-orgasm spanking across my knee from my hairbrush, skirt up, panties down, big breasts jiggling, while holding semen tightly in his mouth put him into the properly submissive state of mind as "the girl" in the relationship required to coat her tonsils with "her man's" precious ejaculate - every last drop. Or perhaps her eagerness to swallow simply results from her wishing to avoid a repeat performance of 100 additional stinging and ass-reddening hairbrush swats across her better half's knee with the cum still rolling around in her mouth.

We can't have that!

So, this time, to make things a little bit easier for him, I took him across my knee and used a hairbrush on his sore marked up bum while he held his goo tightly in his mouth. The pain and humiliation of a post-orgasm spanking across my knee from my hairbrush, skirt up, panties down, big breasts jiggling, while holding semen tightly in his mouth put him into the properly submissive state of mind as "the girl" in the relationship required to coat her tonsils with "her man's" precious ejaculate - every last drop. Or perhaps her eagerness to swallow simply results from her wishing to avoid a repeat performance of 100 additional stinging and ass-reddening hairbrush swats across her better half's knee with the cum still rolling around in her mouth.

Oh believe me, she showed me her cum-coated tongue and swallowed without hesitation this time!

I truly enjoy myself doing this, not the least of my enjoyment coming from the fact that despite his little protests, he is loving it too!

The comments are hot too.  http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2015/04/another-ass-fucking-for-my-husband.html

Chastity Thoughts

If you read this blog for any length of time you quickly realize that I have a tolerate/hate relationship with chastity.  Chastity is fine as I am self chaste, it's the devices that are the pain in the balls (quite literally).  It's not the device that gets me hot, it's Mistress taking control of my cock even though she knows I dislike it.  It's having control taken away from me that's hot.  That being said, I found a post with a device that looks much more comfortable, escape proof and apparently, even a Hitachi can't produce an orgasm.  Here is the post.

So it’s one o’clock in the morning…

I’m horny as hell and developing a whole new level of respect for the Steelworxx Tube Jacket.

My lovely wife still hasn’t gotten around to taking charge of things. To taking the keys yet. I’m determined not to nag or push and to just wait for her to decide the time is right. But that’s another story.

She’s away this weekend so I thought it might be nice to try sleeping in the device just to see how it feels. So I commit to myself I’ll voluntarily wear the Tube Jacket all night.

I miss the feeling of waking up to my little penis straining against metal.
I’ve been fairly suspect of the effectiveness of such a small, minimalist design- no cage- no ring- kind of awkward looking- just a short tight tube right around the sweet spot.

I’ve defeated much more intimidating devices.

Getting to sleep was impossible. It’d been a long time since I’ve worn a chastity device all night. So some time after midnight I decided to just take it off and give myself an orgasm.

But then I decided why not just leave it on and use the Hitachi instead. I haven’t cum in several days so I figured it would be easy. And then I could still wake up with it on.

So I put a towel down on the bathroom counter (confidence!) leaned against the cabinet and started working myself over with the wand.

It felt good. It felt very good.

And I got really close to cumming several times. The last one my legs were quivering and I had to move to the side of the bathtub so I could work on it in a sitting position.

I tried to get off with a Hitachi Magic Wand for a good 20-25 minutes before I finally just gave up.

Between covering the sensitive area and being so tight it really stifled my erection the little Tube Jacket stood its ground against a very powerful vibrator.

A vibrator that would be locked up itself if this was for real.

The Steelworxx Tube Jacket

I was impressed. And pleasantly surprised.

Worked up

My last orgams was March 9th, but who is counting?  I am, here http://missbossybitchsboy.blogspot.com/p/history-of-orgasms.html

The longest I go without orgasms with my Mistress is about 2 weeks so I am now really starting to feel worked up.  Yesterday I was not feeling well so I went to my happy place with some really naughty thoughts.  Naughty enough that I am not even going to post them today.    What I am going to post is a 2 part series from a blog I read whenever she posts.  The blog is very real from what I can tell and would an awesome way to live, but in real life I think it would be more than I could handle.  

I have had to break it up into several days because as soon as I got a little bit into it, my cock would start leaking with me barely even hard...  I wanted to edge, but the leaking is happening before I even get close so I stop.

Here are a few quotes that got to me.

I was getting a bit bored so I thought I would spice things up by exposing David to another woman in the most humiliating way I could think of: anal training followed by a good old fashioned Double Penetration!

"So david, Julie tells me that you two have a very 'interesting' relationship?"

Poor david didn't know what to say. She watched him twist for a little while on that question and then went on.

"Well I'm not going to disappoint Kimberley now that she's come all this way." I said. "You will be taking it, taking every last inch, down your throat AND up your ass. And Kimberley will go as hard, as deep, as fast, and for as long as she wants to."

Part 1

http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2015/03/anal-training-in-front-of-wife-and.html

Part 2

http://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2015/03/husband-spit-roasted.html

Very hot Tumblr Post

I was just going through a couple Tumblr feeds and ran into a very hot post.

My Darling Husband’s career takes him out of town on a regular basis. Being the dutiful and resourceful wife that I am, I use these times to fill his thoughts with bits and pieces of my plans for him when he returns.

I have been playing chess in his head for a number of years, so I know exactly how to give him just enough information to turn his chastised cock into a kickstand but not so much that he would be tempted to touch what belongs to me.

I informed him that it had been too long since he was dressed completely ‘en femme’ and that I needed a nice little pussy to fuck. I have a new squirting dildo, you see, and wanted my gurlfriend to feel the power of a mouth full of cum.

I told my Darling Husband that when he retuned home he would bring me breakfast in bed, then retreat to the bathroom until he was no longer a he. Then …. Rather than making love to my gurlfriend as I have on previous occasions, I was going to fuck her hard, like the little slut that she is.

And so I did.

8 inch dildo in her hole

I fucked her mouth while she was locked into the stockade with an 8 inch dildo stuffed in her cunt - on display, like a piece of meat. Finally after making her gag of my rubber cock a number of times, I squeezed the manufactured cum deep into her throat and all over her face.

 

Afterward, she was dripping but denied her orgasm, even when she begged to be inside of me. I reminded her that slutty little girls play with themselves to cum and placed the Hitachi against her caged clit.

Handcuffed to the bed, she reached her orgasm in seconds, even in chastity, and promptly passed out.

Nicely painted gurl nails

It is good to be the Queen. — KH

http://merrylander.tumblr.com/post/114439635717/my-darling-husbands-career-takes-him-out-of-town

Throwback Thursday

I browsed some old posts and settled on this one.  .............................................................

http://missbossybitchsboy.blogspot.com/2013/10/last-night.html

Got worked up unintentionally

I was searching for additional pictures to put on a recently purchased digital frame.  While looking, I found a lot of pictures that Mistress and I took when we first started dating.  I hadn't seen some in quite a while.  I had forgotten many of them as a lot of those days blurred together.  For some reason, in my mind, there was only one night with Sophia in bondage with pictures taken, but today I found to other nights that were clearly not the same night.  I also found pics of me in a cage as well as me strung up from the ceiling in my old house.  Needless to say, just seeing these pics again got me all fuzzy in the head and a little worked up.  Here is a small blurred snapshot of what got me all hot and bothered.

Quick Post

Sunday Mistress and I had a fun little scene.  We had a Sunday Funday and came home from that a little worked up.  Mistress surprised me by telling me to get the bed ready for some bondage. After I was strapped down she used the hitachi on me and then on herself.  She alternated between a few slaps to my balls and edging me and then working the hitachi on herself (I'm guessing since I was blindfolded).  Mistress then climbed on my cock and started fucking me.

In my horny and drunken state, I asked if I could "run at the mouth".  Any more I try to avoid running at the mouth as I tend to tell her things I regret later.  If she interrogates me I always tell her, but lately she hasn't done that, so  I don't volunteer too much info.   Mistress gave me permission.  I told her I wanted to cum inside her and have her climb on my face and make me suck my cum out of her.  I told her if I fought it to squeeze my balls until I did it.  I think that got her close to an orgasm, but I think she needed more. I told her that I thought about being locked in chastity while she went on her business trip and she really seemed to get off on that.  I was pleasantly surprised that my chastity talk seemed to push her over the edge.  I clearly have a tolerate/hate relationship with chastity, but to think that she can literally get off on the idea of me being locked up, let's just say that excites me greatly.  The last few days I have fantasized about her getting herself off several times a day while I am locked up.

As Mistress got worked up by the chastity talk she started to cum, she ordered me to cum and I did.  The very next thing Mistress did was climb up onto my face while I begged her not to.  I tried to fight it for a few seconds, but since she already surprised me by climbing up on my face I was terrified she might squeeze my super sensitive balls.   I reluctantly dove in and licked what I could.  too be honest I couldn't really tell how much cum came out.  Regardless, Mistress did something I didn't think she had in her.  When it all happened I was disgusted.  I was humiliated.  I was regretting things.  But as I write this I have a hard-on that won't quit.  The thought of Mistress making me do something that I clearly didn't want (post orgasm) far overrides the negative thoughts. The idea of being made to do something against my will touches me in a very deep and primal way.  I'm looking forward to the next thing I am forced to do against my will.

Blog post that I could relate to

I get lots of emails from Fetlife.  90% of them I delete.  Once in a great while I'll find a post that could have been written by me.  Below is that post.  I can identify with it by how often in my life I started to get exactly what I wanted and then I got scared and retreated.  This post just reminded me of how lucky I am to have a woman that has tolerated my occasional flakiness in this reals as well as a reminder to me to rember why I like what I like and how not to mess that up.  Here is the post.

'Lost opportunities. Alas. '

I've come oh-so-close to living in a relationship that involved true D/s, back in the day that is, but I never took that big step. More than once I had the chance, with some wonderful women who had all the qualities you could hope for in a potential partner.  She was serious about female dominance, feminization, bondage, discipline, humiliation as well as chastity.  She had intellect, passion, humor, and strength. A playful, creative spirit, sexuality unburdened and deliciously bent. Literate and wicked, with a voice that drips verbal humiliation like thick, golden honey. Ah, but I wax poetic.

Anyway, I always balked as soon as it became real, I panicked, and back-pedaled the relationships back to vanilla, or even male-dominant. I've played the dominant role most of my life, and comfortably; I'm naturally dominant in all aspects of life, and I've had long-term relationships with submissive women. Loved every minute.

But while being dominant was who I am, it wasn't what fueled my fantasies. I dreamed of Female Led Relationships filled with enforced chastity, role reversal, domestic servitude, feminization and strap-ons. Grass is always greener on the other side, I guess. So, every once in a while, between relationships (I never cheat), I'd try to flip the switch to submissive. Sometimes it was with my vanilla or submissive partner, if they took a real interest in what makes me tick, and showed a capacity to take the reins. Sometimes it didn't work, and the relationship failed. But what was even worse, sometimes they took to dominance like a duck to water. THAT was what scared me! The closer they got to making my deep fantasies come true, the more I'd try to wriggle away.

One girlfriend, brilliant and beautiful, seized her power and took steps to put me in chastity. It starts as pillow talk, but when it moves to conversations outside the bedroom, you know she's seriously thinking about it. We were just moving in together, and one night over dinner, she informed me that I was about to be placed in chastity. With an evil grin and a dispassionate tone, she outlined her intent to wean me off her pussy and transition me to a life of strictly regimented chastity and denial. Gulp! 
She walked me over to the computer and made me watch as she ordered the chastity device. "Um..." I stammered, as her finger hovered gracefully over the mouse before the final click.

"Too late now," she teased, "I ordered it, so you are certainly going to wear it." Then she dismissed me to do the dishes and clean up, chores appropriate for one of my diminishing status.

Long story short, it came, she came, and I didn't get to come.

It was so hot, so exciting, and so wrong that it was so right. But rather than go with it, I resisted, Lord knows why, it was my fantasy, after all. But I couldn't let go of my pride and my dominant side long enough to just have some fun, and my resistance sent her mixed signals. She wondered if she was doing something wrong, started doubting her dominance, and we just took things back to more familiar ground.

I always wonder what if. Ah, well. One thing is certain, I've learned my lesson. To quote a friend, "Had to learn the hard way, to let her pass by." Next time, if there is such a thing, I'm in. You can bet on it. It's a lock.

Hangover Horny

Apparently I am a little hungover today.  I don't really feel hungover, but with the thoughts going through my mind, it's the only logical explanation.

A short recap.  I think Mistress had a new way to torture me while pleasing herself.  She now seems very fond of strapping me down to the bed, blindfolded where she can pleasure herself with the hitachi and tease / hurt me at the same time.  I don't get to make her cum nor do I get to see her cum.  It's quite the mindfuck.

So now to my naughty thoughts today. Since I woke up this morning, I've thought about all of these things.

• having my ass stuffed with a large butt plug
• wearing high heels until my feet hurt
• locked in chastity
• with a slutty tight dress on
• wearing heavy eye makeup, women's deodorant and perfume
• being forced to send Mistress humiliating pictures of myself
• forced to suck a dildo
• tied to the bed, wearing dildo gag, Mistress putting the dildo in her and using the hitachi on herself while I drown in her juices
• Mistress using the little syringes to suck up my cum and inject it into my mouth.

That's all for now...  I just wanted to share before these thoughts went away.  I think seeing this post earlier this morning might have aided in my mood today.  http://akashaweb.com/updates/StableUpdateJan22.html

I LOVE MY MISTRESS!