Going to Regret

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Night Time

3:15 AM
I turn in my sleep
Something feels strange
I'm in a pink nighty Mistress told me to put on at bedtime
My cock gets hard
I pull the nighty down to cover my cock
My cock gets harder
My brain starts thinking about Mistress doing nasty things to me
I drift off to sleep with thoughts going through my mind
5:15 AM
I turn in my sleep
Something feels strange
I'm in a pink nighty Mistress told me to put on at bedtime
My cock gets hard
I pull the nighty down to cover my cock
My cock gets harder
My brain starts thinking about Mistress doing nasty things to me
I can't go back to sleep
I keep thinking about nasty things
I lay next to Mistress feeling pleasantly humiliated
I get up to go to the bathroom
I lift up my nighty and sit like a girl
I notice the lace of the nighty and my pink toenails
I walk out and see my reflection in the mirror
The nighty clings to my body
I wish it were warmer in the house
I wish I had the guts to wear the nighty until it's time to get dressed for the day
I take the nighty off
I notice the bra-like marks the nighty leaves in my skin
Mild humiliation runs through me
I hang up the nighty for all to see and to humiliate me throughout the day and evening
I feel very, very fortunate that I have a Mistress that is willing to indulge me and push my boundaries

Oral Worship

For the most part Mistress isn't into receiving oral sex.  I don't think it does much for her, as she is big into penetration.  However that doesn't mean I don't fantasize about being required provide oral sex or to be tortured with her pussy.  For some reason in both Male Dom and Female Domme porn, being required to service the dominant is seen as submissive.  For that reason I frequently fantasize about Mistress making me service her pussy and ass, her smothering me with her pussy and ass as well as squirting all over my face when she comes.  I dream of her taking her juices and smearing them all over my face and not untied until they are dry. Forbidden to wash them off. I think about hours spent between her legs, sometime gagged just so I can be immersed in her scent.  Mistress using her body to not only pleasure herself but to humiliate me in the process, I get hard just thinking about it.  I want to be her pussy worshiping slave.

Here are some hot examples (many, many examples)

Delaying

Mistress gave me a task to wear my butt plug for a minimum of 3 hours today.  Normally I do it as soon as possible to get it over with.  Today I will wait until I get home from work.  I want the anticipation to build all day.  To think about how long it's been.  To have everything build up.  I want to be plugged when Mistress comes home.  I want to feel the shame and erotic humiliation of the things I am willing to do.  I want my early morning horniness to go away so the shame is even greater.  I dream of Mistress making me drop my pants to show her I am plugged or to have to ask permission to remove it after the three hours.  I also dream of her making me put my plug in before bed but still having the 3 hour minimum rule.  I would either sleep with naughty thoughts or barely sleep at all.

Gotta run!

Free - for now

Mistress let me out of chastity last night.  I can safely admit that as much as I wanted to stay in chastity to beat some sort of record I am thrilled to be out.  Getting released is a physical relief, but a mental let down. It's such psychological torture.  Mistress has made sure to stay in my head today, as she sent me an email to wear something sexy under my clothes today.  I will be wearing a sexy pair of fishnet tights that I bought super cheap a few weeks ago.  I'm going to be feeling naughty and very desperate.  I love it when she is in my head.

On my previous post about "other D/s couples" I forgot one.

Mistress L - Where i enjoy collecting ideas and sharing my real life d/s relationship, mostly to humiliate my gimp slave.  Some very hot play they have.  She seems nice, but mean when it counts.

Here is a hot post.
My favorite way to turn my pathetic slave into a fuck toy is restrain him nice and tight and gag him with a penis gag. Took the blindfold off to give him the pleasure of watching my ass bounce up and down his face. His useless little cock was so hard just watching me i couldn’t help but laugh.

After i came, i told him i was going to give him a blow job. The pathetic bitch got excited, only to see me lick and suck the dildo on his face clean. 
My poor slave was so frustrated watching my mouth slide up and down, wishing my wet lips were on his cock instead…too bad fuck face, i wouldn’t bother sucking that little worm.

A few more

http://mistr3ss-l.tumblr.com/post/129849143329/my-real-life-ds-relationship-after-i-teased-his

http://mistr3ss-l.tumblr.com/post/130769626802/my-real-life-ds-relationship-forcing-my-slave

http://mistr3ss-l.tumblr.com/post/129204214134/my-real-life-ds-relationship-look-at-my

http://mistr3ss-l.tumblr.com/post/126088468214/a-nice-little-throw-back-to-an-old-pic-on-my

Silent Spankings

I ran across this the other day...

Today, we have both girls and all of the grandkids over at the house in the pool. My domina had instructed me to plant some flowers that she had bought and do a few other chores. after about an hour of working, I sat on the deck for a few minutes and watched the kids swimming. Instead of gaining her permission, I made that decision on my own....... mistake.

She came outside and asked me if I had everything done. I explained that I was resting for a few minutes and she looked at me puzzled and leaned over and whispered in my ear, " I don't recall giving permission for that". I started to get up and she quickly stopped me and asked me if I could give her a hand inside. I followed her into the bedroom and she instructed me to strip completely and lay face down on the bed. I did as instructed, fearing that the strap was soon to follow. "since the kids are in an and out, I can't punish you properly for now, but I have something in mind:. She tied my hands to he headboard and I could feel her rubbing my butt cheeks. she then went on to explain that she had recently read about silent spankings on a discipline web site, what she had rubbed on was a capsaicin cream used for arthritis. as she walked out, she told me things should be warming up shortly. she then informed me that my chastity release she had planned on for Father's Day was now to be postponed indefinitely.

I lay on the bed for about 10 minutes and suddenly felt by butt starting to get very warm. The warmth gave way to a very intense stinging that got worse as time went on. after 30 minutes, she came back in and untied me and told me to go finish what I had been instructed to do. as I finished my chores, the burning continued. After finishing, I went back to the deck and sat down to talk to the girls and realized that I could barely sit as the burning on my butt grew worse as I sat there. It has now been two hours since the application and I still feel a burning, but not as bad as before. My wife asked me which was worse, a full blown spanking or the silent spanking. I told her the silent spanking was just as bad as the aftermath of a real spanking without the pain of the spanking being administered. she gave me a knowing smile and walked away, apparently pleased with her new discovery......

One more article on it.  http://cornertimeconfidential.blogspot.com/2014/04/youre-going-to-be-sleeping-on-your.html

Random Rambling

Just some random thoughts.

I have now been locked up for a full week with a short 2 hour break so that Mistress and I could have sex and a nice nap.  I was a shit yesterday morning so I have earned at least another day in chastity.  I don't even question the extension.  I deserve it.  I thought putting myself back into chastity would be tough, but I wanted to show Mistress how serious I am about serving her, about her setting the guidelines of my behavior and how much I want her to be meaner to me.  In reality, she can put me in chastity for whatever reason she wants.  It just so happens in this case it's to correct some behavior.

It was awesome being inside of Mistress.  With my cock having no feeling other than dead air or a tight metal squeeze, being inside of her was amazing.  One downside to chastity is the inevitable premature ejaculation from the new amazing sensations.

I still have some markings from last Saturday night's scene with the rubber bands.  I really, really like being bruised and marked for so long.

Chastity downside.  I don't get to wear panties as none of them will accommodate my device although maybe that's what crotch-less panties are for.

I love Mistress taking control and bossing me around.  That's how we got the name of this blog, as she is bossy by nature.  I also take control, but I love submitting to her bossy nature.  It does things to my brain that I cannot deny.

I look forward to Mistress being meaner.  I think it's hard for her.  It's not normal to treat someone badly and think you are doing them a favor, especially when you love someone.  I just have to keep embracing the mean side and when she wants to be nice (like letting me out of chastity to shave) I need to help her be firm in being mean to me.  Ultimately it will serve us both well.  

I wish I could edge right now.  Feel my cock get hard without discomfort.  Get to that glorious place just before I cum.  Maybe leaking a bit and having to lick it up.  But no such luck.  All I get to do is fantasize about it which is probably one of the great things about chastity.

Since I am on the topic, I have spent all week thinking about being locked up for a # of days without release.  I'd like to set a personal record for being locked up.  The only problem is it will be mentally tough without a lot of effort on both of our parts, as the tease is as is more important as the deny.

My head is spinning with lust thinking about being back inside my Mistress.

Other D/s Couples

One of the best things about the internet is that you quickly learn that you are more normal than society wants you to realize.  I was into bondage before I knew there was such a thing.  I loved being the tied up kid whenever we played cops and robbers, cowboys and indians or any other game kids play that require someone to be a captive.  I especially liked it when my best friends older sisters "captured" me.  I had long detailed fantasies about being the popular girls' slave in junior high and the nasty things they would make me do.  As an adult, I obviously knew about BDSM, but to get any new information I had to go to adult bookstores in the bad part of town.  Just walking into those places made me feel dirty.  Then came 1996 and consistent internet access.  There was a whole world of D/s, all from the comfort of your own home.  I quickly learned that millions of people around the world shared my interest.  Being a guy that occasionally like to wear girls underwear or tied tied up and humiliated was no longer a bad thing.  To be fair, I still hide it as society really doesn't allow us to "some out", but I'm OK with that as I don't have any need for people who know me to know me any more than they already do.

That brings me to this posts topic.  Other D/s couples and what I like about them.  Here are some in no particular order.

Strict Julie Spanks! - Recently this is the one I am drawn to the most.  What I like, she gives her husband spankings that scare me just reading about them, but I still find them super hot.  She also finds ways to bring women into their house for the sole purpose of humiliating her man.  Some of my favorite posts are.  

Beating your man properly

Advice for Wives

Husband Severely Switched by Trainer

Husband wants to be a Girl for the Night

Bra Fitting at Victoria's Secret!

femdom101 - This one sticks in my mind for 2 reasons.  1.  She found out about Femdom unintentionally.  She found out her husband had been visiting a pro-domme.  While she naturally freaked out, she also wanted to find out why.  It turns out it wasn't about being with other women, it was about being controlled.  She befriended the pro-domme and learned what made him tick.  the second reason is the "cage time" she instituted while she was learning.  It allowed him to submit and her to know she had full control.  The ides of being in a cage turns me on and scares me.

In The Beginning-The Kennel

Real Life Female Domination - This one gets me hot for one reason.  She's a total bitch to her boy.  She frequently ties him down and sets up a long and torturous session but for the most part requires little effort on her part.  She uses it to get some "alone time".  For most of these sessions she puts earplugs or headphones in his ears.  She blindfolds him before putting a mask on him.  She gags him with a funnel in his mouth that she either spits in or puts ice in (the ice is usually made from her piss and/or his cum).  She then reads books and watches TV shows and she uses a baby monitor to keep an eye on his safety.  Usually once or twice an hour she will edge him, or hurt his cock with a ruler or icy-hot on his cock and balls (a very painful and long lasting punishment) or nettles (something Mistress had me try on my cock at a fetish event we attended.  For 1-4 hours his only world is the pain she puts him through and the taste of her piss.  He can't see, hear or feel anything other than her bitchiness.  Very scary, and very hot.

Yet More TSD bondage

Making sensory deprivation worse!

The Big 6 O

More Sensory Deprivation

This girl's weblog - of life married to a deviously dominant madman! - This one is with a female submissive, but I like it because of how elaborate their setups are.  

Z is for . . .

Deviant Display - Just hot with their outfits and their exhibitionism.  That and he seems locked in chastity quite a bit.

sailorsub asked: How do You get Your pet to leak so much?

Caged cock whore.

The family dog

Barefoot Princess - I can't vouch or their relationship, but I believe they are in one as he has been in all of her videos for years.  The reason I like her videos is due to how "mean" she is to her boy.  He is usually tied uncomfortably. If he comes without permission she abuses his balls after he cums and laughs the whole time.  She squeezes and kneads his balls while at the same time stroking his cock.  And lastly she makes him eat lots and lots of cum.  My favorite scene is where she has him in a cage.  His condom covered cock sticks out one end and his head is at the other end with a funnel in his mouth.  She uses a Hitachi to get him to cum in the condom and once he comes she dumps it in the funnel.  Very hot.

About to cum in condom and then eat it

Another cum eating scene

What will she do with that funnel?

A great example of holding a coin up with his nose.  His back will hurt soon.

 There are a lot of other blogs out there with great ideas, but I like these because they seem to be in loving relationships and make my weirdness seem a little more normal.

Other thoughts

I have completed 3 days of uninterrupted chastity and am starting on my 4th day.  I have added a counter to the blog so that everyone that reads this blog will know my current situation.

Last night Mistress was understandably upset with me about something in our real life, so she made me wear a nighty again and didn't roll a dice to see if I would be let out for the night.  In reality I wasn't at all upset that she wasn't going to roll the dice as I have totally accepted the fact that I will be locked up for a minimum of 7 days straight.  In fact it's a mental goal I have.  If I can do a week with no issues after being unlocked for almost a year, I can likely do any amount of time. The idea of being released for even a few hours is more of a mind fuck.  It's like the warden telling the prisoner he's about to get paroled just to fuck with him.

While I wasn't upset about being unlocked, I was upset that I didn't treat Mistress better last night.  She had a tough day and I didn't pick up on how tough it was.  So I was mad at myself for disappointing her.  I try to serve her in many ways and one of those being her sounding board when she's had a tough day.  I can do better.

The fact I was upset with myself made the nighty and another night in chastity a fitting punishment in my mind while I drifted off to sleep.  The many times I awoke during the night reinforced my mental state as her slave.  As such, I woke in an extremely submissive, horny and feminine mood.

Obviously chastity is at the top of my mind, but that doesn't mean I don't have other thoughts.  Mistress and I just got a new bathtub.  We're having some issues with it, but when it's repaired I fantasize about something like this.  Very, very hot.

Now I am off to shave my body and re-do my nail polish.  Today toenails will be pink and fingernails with a tiny bit of color (not clear).

Difficulty in a good way.

As I write this my current time in lock up is 2 days 1 hour and 20 minutes, but who's counting?  Going back to last year my longest continuous lock up was 7.5 days which surprisingly was Oct 7-14th or almost the same week a year earlier.  I was locked up 5 times and only one time was less than 2.5 days.

I mention it because I had a chance to get released for about 8 hours last night.  Apparently Mistress liked a few ideas in yesterday's post.  One was wearing a nighty in addition to chastity.  As predicted it added another layer of difficulty to my night of sleep.  When I say difficulty, I don't mean that as a complaint, I mean that as it was difficult in just the right way.  First off I picked a nighty that was too restrictive.  But instead of whining or trying to get out of it I sucked it up and did my best to deal with it.  I actually tried to find a way to ask Mistress to let me change into another one, but I also feared she might let me, and I wanted to endure it.  I went to bed frustrated and a little angry at myself for putting myself in such an uncomfortable position.  However during the night that difficulty worked its magic.  Every time I woke up to change positions I not only had to adjust my chastity device I had to adjust my nighty.  Every time I did that, it went straight to my brain.  It reinforced the idea that I am a submissive that craves to be treated this way.  I would end up with thoughts of Mistress making me sleep in far less comfortable circumstances and making my current situation seem like a walk in the park.  I fantasized about sleeping in restraints, or a cage, or the strait jacket or pantyhose and bra, etc.  That in turn got me super hard and uncomfortable in my chastity device.  I just stewed in my own thoughts until my brain was submissively mushy.

Mistress also seemed to like the dice game.  As mentioned above, I had the opportunity to be out of my device over night.  Mistress asked me to pick a number and if she rolled that number I would be released for the night.  I picked a 3 and she rolled a 4.  It was a mind-fuck thinking I would get out and I had a 17% chance of it happening.  Had she actually rolled a 3 I would have been happy on one side but disappointed on the other.  I am embracing being in chastity and am wearing my time locked up with a sense of pride.  Getting out (even for a short while) would be such a catch-22.  As such I woke up this morning with a little bit of shame for being such a slut, but also with a ton of pride that I endured a night in chastity and a very restrictive nighty.  I look forward to enduring increasingly challenging situations.

I have actually been fantasizing about being locked in chastity for weeks on end, but also am very aware of the challenges and work it would take on both of our parts to due it successfully.  We have too much going on these days to make that work positively for both of us, but a guy can fantasize.

When researching some dice ideas there were a few more that came up.  

• Assigning the # of a roll to a task or punishment 
• Rolling dice to calculate a number of spankings
• Rolling dice to calculate a number of edges
• Rolling dice to calculate # of orgasms Mistress gets before I get one.

In the interest of not topping from the bottom, a quick google search of "chastity dice ideas" with or without the word dice "femdom dice ideas" or "bdsm dice ideas" has a lot of interesting games although some seem very convoluted.  

Lastly, I was being a little snarky last night.  Mistress advised me that I had better watch myself.  She said she had a punishment that I would not enjoy and that if I didn't watch myself she would use it.

Now I have no idea what it is, and I am sure I wouldn't like it, at least not while it was happening, afterward is another story :-)  That being said, I find it super, super hot that she is thinking of ways to not only punish me but also make sure the punishment is harsh.  I sense a "be careful what you wish for" scenario coming up.  I am a lucky, lucky man.

Locked with markings still showing from Saturday's scene

  

        

So it begins

I have now been locked up over 24 hours and as much as I hate to admit it, it is going better than I expected.  By changing my mindset from dreading it to embracing it I am better prepared to handle the challenges of chastity.  By accepting that the reason I am in chastity is 100% my fault and allows me to deal with it.

My first day in chastity reminded me of some of the difficulty of being in chastity, but with every pinch, pain or frustration I had, I told myself, this is how you make Mistress feel by your actions.  I'm owning how I have acted and how that has affected her.  I am accepting (dare I say enjoying) my fate.

Wearing my device with pride, and bruises.

As soon as my head hit the pillow last night my mind started racing.  I thought about how the next week will be, how Mistress will likely be in my head and fuck with me, keeping me on my toes.  I thought about her leaving my key in her desk at work.  I thought about how I'm lucky I wasn't in a nighty too.  Talk about a night filled with images...

Last night I made dinner using a spice called cumin.  We made a couple jokes about how lately I have loved cumin in recipes and the joke quickly got to how I love cumming.  Mistress mentioned that she is intending on making me cum in the next couple days and locking me back up immediately.  I told her that was mean and she said, "I know that.  You said you wanted me to be meaner".  To which I confessed I truly did want her to be meaner and thought to myself "much meaner".

All of that being said, I am feeling a little oversexed right now.  Chastity is the ultimate mind fuck.  When I am unlocked, I can forget about my cock, and therefore forget about touching myself, forget about sex, forget about porn, etc.  I can pretty much delegate sexual thoughts out of my mind, even though I have full access to my cock.

When I am locked and I want to push thoughts to the back of my mind, I cannot.  All I can do is think about my cock, which makes me want to touch it, makes me want to cum, makes me want to fuck Mistress, and makes me a sexual mess.  There is no pushing sexual thoughts out for more than a few minutes at a time.

That being said, now that I am locked up, I can make up a "scene idea" for chastity.  The reason I didn't do it sooner was I was afraid Mistress would take that as I wanted to be locked up.    

Here are some chastity ideas.    # 13 (unlucky # 13 ) Chastity

Thank you Mistress for locking me up and telling me you plan on being meaner.  I'm in heaven!

Penance

pen•ance (ˈpɛn əns)

Noun

"A punishment for a sinful act or wrongdoing. It may be intended to serve as reparation for the act."

This morning I got out of bed to find Mistress had placed my chastity device on my bathroom vanity.  As required, I reminded Mistress that I was to start my week of chastity punishment this morning.  I wasn't 100% sure if she was going to go through with it.  Physically I would have been thrilled if she didn't go through with it, but mentally and emotionally I would have been sad.  It's a real conundrum to hate something so much, but at the same time need it at my very core.

The last time I was was locked up was last November, so apparently I had been pretty good up until now.  I keep a log of my time in chastity on this blog  Chastity Tracker and it appears my attitude might be seasonal.  From Sept 8th to November 7th 2014 I was locked up for a total of 14.5 days.  I went back and read some of the posts from last year.  They were very similar to my recent posts about wanting my limits pushed and for Mistress to be meaner to me.  There was even a post about Mistress extending my release date because I forgot to do something I was told to do.  As it should be.

As a reminder, I am in chastity because I have been a shit.  I have been snapping at Mistress and I have been short with her.  I needed a reminder of my place in our relationship, a place I crave to be. Since chastity is 24/7 and by it's very design, there is no way to forget about it.  I am constantly reminded of being locked, having no access and feel somewhat emasculated.  For as long as Mistress keeps me locked up, I will remind myself of my wrongs and how to be a better slave.  I will remind  myself that she didn't do this to me, I did it to myself.  I will embrace this punishment because I would much rather Mistress correct me with D/s than with no D/s whatsoever.  Being locked up, being beaten badly, being forced to stand in a corner with my pants around my ankles are all preferable to Mistress not using D/s to reward or punish me.

 I am a submissive at heart and am so grateful to have found someone that understands me enough to correct me when I falter vs. being resentful.   I am blessed.

P.S.  Follow Up to the other night.  Mistress asked me which was worse, the rubber band or the ugly stick.  Their pain is the same.  The difference is the rubber band is there as a constant reminder.  Also as a standard household item, it;s kind of a mind fuck.  As far as the ugly stick, its benefit is the surprise effect.  You know where the rubber band will hit you.  You have no clue where the ugly stick will hit.  They each have their benefit in the dominant's tool box.

Yesterday's marks from Sunday. 

Today' marks from Sunday.  Starting to bruise Yay!