I just wanted to take a few minutes to share some thoughts during the last couple days.
Chastity. In the past I would be locked up as a punishment, or to prevent touching when we are apart, but mostly as punishment. Mistress hasn't communicated why I am locked up, so I am calling it "because I said so", which I find pretty fucking hot. Last night we went to a party and Mistress asked if I could wear a certain pair of jeans while locked. I told her I could but I would certainly take any opportunity to be out. While one side of me appreciates the gesture of being released the other half feels it's my job to take it even if it is uncomfortable. I wear baggy pants for working around the house and running errands, but can certainly be in chastity in tight jeans while sitting for a meal, hanging out a friends house, going to a movie or standing at a party. As soon as I got up this morning I put on my device. I wanted to show Mistress that I am submitting no matter what. If I have to debate whether or not I should do something submissive or not, I will just assume the answer is yes, I need to submit.
Nighties. As much as I like to think wearing a nighty every night makes it normal and it loses it's edge, it doesn't. No matter how much into feminization I get into I can;t every imagine it feeling "normal" to me, nor do I want it to. I like the erotic humiliation I feel. I love/hate how I feel in the morning when I walk into our bathroom in the morning and Mistress sees me in a nighty. It's a great mind fuck.
Humiliation. I have been thinking about this a lot, especially as it pertains to chastity and feminization. As I was reading emails from 5 years ago, when I first revealed my feminine side to Mistress, I was reminded of her making me show her my entire wardrobe. She made me try on every single thing and decided what I could keep and what I had to donate to goodwill. She made me get rid of the really slutty stuff and focused on things that made me look sexy. Playing that back in my mind, I remember the humiliation and how much I loved it. I think of Mistress making me do the same thing again, just for the humiliation aspect. I think of her making my lie on top of the covers in my nighty for a bit before bed, since I currently hide myself under them. I think of having to get up and change into girls clothes, even if it's and a girls shirt (bra added of course). I think of her making comments when I am locked in chastity. Things like "how does it feel to not be able to feel your cock?", "Don't you wish you could get a hard on?", "You liked being locked up for me don't you?". "you deserve chastity don't you?" "I had an orgasm today, thinking about you locked up for me." I dream about her frequently rubbing my device or making me open my pants to show her or making me post pictures of me in chastity. The mental aspect of this is just as exciting as the physical.
To end, here are some postings that really spoke to me on Friday.
I have frequently thought about Mistress cuckolding me with another woman. This 2 part story is probably one of the hottest I have ever read, and I think a lot of it is because I am pretty sure it;s true and not some dude's fantasy. This is the same woman that I quote frequently.
Part one Husband Punished by Wife in front of Escort
Part two Girl Sex with the Escort!!!!
A blog post...
I believe we are at the two week mark today. Two weeks of chastity and denial for him.
Two weeks of fantastic orgasms and borderline-sadistic torturing for me.
Last night was no exception. He knows he is not allowed to have an orgasm and must beg me to stop whatever I am doing to prevent that or be punished. I rode him until I was satisfied, then made him ride my Feeldoe until he was edged to my satisfaction.
Then, with him cuffed and collared, I used my vibrator on his incredibly sensitive cock until he was literally writhing and begging me to stop before he was unable to control himself any longer.
I kissed him on the forehead and went to sleep, leaving him a molten mess - which, truth be told, is exactly where he longs to be.
Frustrated to the edge of insanity. – KH
This must be the best ruined orgasm I have seen. It's like a full 5 seconds from when she quits stroking him to him spurting.