One question that I have for you is about the section in the book that refers to slave vs slave husband and the disconnect one must have in order to maintain the dynamic. I believe this really is my issue! I love my husband and think of him as my partner and anchor. Do you find that in your relationship with your slave that you have to disconnect from the love you feel for him as a husband? any tips on your end to achieve this disconnect?
My bitch-boy is submissive at his core. It is fundamental that I know that, although I subject him to things he really, really hates at the time they are happening, and his life is controlled, denying him many freedoms – the result is that the more I treat him this way, the more soundly he sleeps, the more contented he is during all our vanilla moments. And the worse I treat him, the more he obviously worships me.
Yes I do shut off the dynamic and do some relaxing things together like watch TV and sleep in the same bed, discuss work problems, etc. However, even in these times he absolutely knows that I see him as my pet, my toy, my slave, my property – to do with as I wish. In the times in question, I wish for the dynamic to be off and he knows that it will be switched back on at my whim when I choose. And there is nothing he can do about it. (Except deal with it as best he can.)
However.. after reading your blog, talking with you and reading Ingrid’s book I am changing! After that first day of training and behavioral modification i felt this amazing power that I really have never felt before. last night when I had him restrained in his sleepsack and was punishing his cock with the icy hot and crop i felt even more power and his whimpering made me explode! I have never experienced orgasms quite like last night.. it was mind blowing!
A submissive will test you from time to time and this may have been a test. I believe they want things to happen that they genuinely do not like, because it proves to them that they are truly helpless and controlled.
My orgasms are huge! Its such a delight. I am not sure why. I think the fact that I accept completely that I am a cruel, heartless, sadistic bitch and that I can do whatever I want to my human toy liberates me to be both relaxed and cruel and decadent. I am not sure really.
The rest of the trip needless to say his behavior was exceptional !! Did I mentioned he was tied to that toilet for 5 hours :-)
I am not sure I am an expert but I can give you the benefit of my experience. I started by making bitch-boy (bb) wear woman’s pink knickers all the time. 100% Cotton so that he did not get all sweaty and nasty. My next step was an amazingly frilly pair of cream and pink knickers from a Sissy Adult website, to wear around the house on display when serving me. His utter shame and humiliation over these motivated me to go much further. Choices included French maid, School girl, little girl. I started with French maid.
bitch-boy is in for a very tough weekend today and tomorrow. He will be used and abused, humiliated and painfully hurt and he will be waiting on me hand and foot (when he isn’t helplessly bound!). I will let you know more next week. I had a working at home day in the week just gone. He went through a very tough time for 10 hours. I did not even release his little cock from its restraint tube. My orgasms were huge! He was very subdued by bedtime which was very sweet.