Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Moving forward again

Over the last couple of days I worked on a BDSM checklist to give to Mistress.  It has been a good 5 years since I have done one and I was interested in how it would come out.  The checklist was very detailed and made me consider many things I wouldn't think of on my own necessarily.  I was especially candid and I surprised myself with how many things I would actually consider doing.  Since doing that checklist my mind has been filled with so many scenarios that my mind is a hot mess.  Last night I had trouble falling asleep and this morning I awoke early and couldn't go back to sleep because I cannot shut off my submissive brain.  My libido is in overdrive.

To add to it, Mistress has started coming up with some rules/protocols for me to follow.  Many I should have already been doing.  I am excited to see what else she comes up with, and a little concerned what else will be added to the list.  That being said, I expect some challenges and to be pushed.  However at the end of the day I want Mistress to really get something out of this dynamic.  One thing I can't get out of my head is a post I read while researching the protocol topic.  The Master made a numbered list of rules for his female slave to follow.  He had her record the list of rules in her voice on her phone.  He would then tie her down for hours at a time while blindfolded and made her listen to the rules repeat over and over until she learned them by heart.  It took a few sessions, but eventually he could pick a number and she would be able to recite the rule word for word.  She had no excuses to not know the rules after that.

There is one thing that appears to be happening that I didn't expect.  Mistress appears to be making my wearing women's clothes at home a permanent situation.  Last month, when I wore women's clothes in the house for an entire week, I thought it was a one time thing.  This requirement has started back up and I don't get the feeling it's going to end any time soon.  Now I don't mind it, but it's definitely one of those "be careful what you wish for" moments.  It certainly hits me somewhere deep in my mind.  If this is the route we are going, I feel unprepared for it.  I need to bulk up my wardrobe, especially for winter.  Much of what I own in women's wear shows too much skin to be warm.  If I am going to do this, I want to do it right.  I need to start a list! Additionally, if I am to be dressing this way around the house for the rest of my life I could afford to purge many of my male items to make room for women's items.  In reality I only need a couple pairs of pajama bottoms for when we have company overnight.  Everything else can go to Goodwill.  Getting rid of most of my casual male clothes, talk about a mind fuck.

I am excited where this is headed.  I am looking forward to being Mistress' well trained slave that does her bidding without question.


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