Showing posts with label smothering. Show all posts
Showing posts with label smothering. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 27, 2019

More and More Desperate - And Loving It

Every morning, I am sexually desperate.  A combination of testosterone, mixed with nightly feminization mixed with full-time chastity is driving me sexually mad.  Each day as my body slowly starts to wake up, my mind stirs with disturbing thoughts. My cock gets hard and strains against my chastity cage. I fantasize about having painful, humiliating or disgusting things done to me.  I yearn to be treated harshly and to be made to do things that challenge me. I fantasize about the idea of cumming and at the same time hoping that I remain denied. I fantasize and cringe at the same time about electric play.  Electric devices scare me but fascinated me at the same time. I also have fantasies I wish I didn’t have. Ones that I don’t want to happen but my mind still goes there.

Some mornings I am so desperate to feel more naughty that I will wear a feminine item under my male clothes.  A feminine tank top or camisole rubs against my chest as I take the dog for a walk.  Making me even hornier.  I’m erotically ashamed of this behavior and hide it from Mistress.

As the day goes on my horniness drops. I’m too busy to be hyper-sexualized. That doesn’t mean my desperation goes away, it’s just reduced. I have constant reminders of my situation. Chasity is always there. I occasionally get a whiff of the intoxicating perfume I wear.  Whenever I am barefoot, my pink painted toenails make my brain twitch a bit.

Each night the cycle starts over as I slip into a nighty before climbing into bed. Occasionally I try to skip the nighty but Mistress catches this and makes sure I obey. I love her for doing this to /for me.  Some nights I have dreams.  A recent one had Mistress reverse sitting on my face with the threat of me not breathing unless I licked her furiously.  Another had me going to a private executive suite dressed in my male clothes with instructions to change into my feminine attire once I arrived. Mistress would use a webcam to give me humiliating tasks and to ensure I stayed dressed in this busy office.

When I dream like this I am even more ramped up and desperate the next day. Thanks to chastity and orgasm denial I don’t see my frustration ever ending. That makes me horny, happy and eager to serve my Mistress in any way possible.

Today’s mood.