Normally I post some kinky fantasy of mine or pictures that got me going. Today is different.
I am a fairly passive guy. I don't pick fights. I try not to step on toes or make others feel obligated. I prefer being an observer. I don't initiate very well. All of these things seem to help me feel submissive. The flip side is that I have been told as I come across as not interested. That's really not the case.
I am more in love with my Mistress than I have been with anyone else, ever. She gets me on so many levels. She doesn't nag. She trusts me. She indulges my fantasies. I think about her many more times a day in so many ways. There isn't a good way to describe my feelings. All I know is she is my everything.
The problem is, with her I am passive and I try not to make her feel obligated and in turn I don't initiate. My plan over the last few weeks has been to put a note on the door, asking her to come to the bedroom, so that when she comes home she knows I want her. I chicken out.
So here is a list of what I miss.
I miss long make out sessions.
I miss lying in bed in the morning being sexual.
I miss heading to bed to be sexual when we come home from a date.
I miss being a little naughty in the car.
I miss stripping when I come into the room with candles lit.
I miss feeling like I can push her down and ravish her and know it's ok (my insecurity, not her)
I miss naked sloppy sex on a regular basis.
None of the above is to make MBB feel obligated, it's just to let her know I think about her and us constantly, to let her know I do desire her, and to let her know I acknowledge I have shortcomings when it comes to initiating.
I love her so much.